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How much of this would I have to carry around with me?
“Piper?” I put my head in my hand and closed my eyes tight.
“Hm?”
“I’m falling in love with you,” I said softly.
That’s not all of it.
I took a deep breath. “You’re the only thing I need. And I am a class act fuck-up.” I fisted the blankets with my other hand. “I’m in love with you. And I don’t know what to fucking do about it. I don’t understand this stuff like you do. And you’re the person I can’t talk to about it. Fuck. You’re never going to see me like how I see you. And it’s fucking killing me, ice princess”
Nothing. No response.
I looked up and Piper was fast asleep, snoring softly on the pillow.
“Of course.” I chuckled without humor. “Yeah. This isn’t worse at all.”
With about as much pride as I could muster, I pushed myself up to a standing position and checked Piper’s phone. Nothing. No phone calls from the front desk, no emergencies I needed to respond to in five minutes about the dumbass athletes in the building doing dumb shit.
Peace and quiet.
Peace and quiet and the hurt that swelled up in my body with no regard for anything else. Peace and quiet and my own thoughts to wonder how long I’d get to keep Piper around.
How long can she stomach me?
The floorboard creaked when I reached the door and Piper stirred in the blankets.
“Sorry,” I whispered.
“Adam?” Piper blinked again and held out her hand.
I frowned. “What?”
But she didn’t stop holding out her hand until I came close and then, with the smallest gestures, she motioned back to the bed. Back to the bed with her.
Yeah, that couldn’t happen.
Worse than sex, Piper wanted me to climb into the covers and hold her until she fell asleep.
Bad fucking idea.
Especially since I’d cuddled with exactly zero people in my life. It was my regular schtick to zip up my pants before whatever bleacher bunny and I could even have a full conversation, much less cuddling.
How do you even do it? Where do you put your arms?
“Uh…Piper…”
“I’m cold.” She fumbled for my hand, trying to bring me closer.
“See, I can…get you some blankets,” I said, not meaning a fucking word of it.
No sex. Just two people in bed together. I uncovered the blankets and slipped in next to her. She was warm. And soft. And everything I wanted.
Piper shifted back against me. Right against my cock. Fuck me. But I had to keep still to have her close like this. Holding back a groan, I wrapped my arms around her, getting rid of all the distance between us.
If the phone rings, I’m breaking it in half.
This was self-destructive behavior that couldn’t end. It was the knife buried in my side that I couldn’t take out if I wanted to live.
