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The ache in his groin grew almost unbearable as he yearned for her touch. He wanted to lose himself in her, to forget the pain and sorrow of the day he had just endured—burying his father and taking on the weight of responsibility that now rested solely on his shoulders.
With her innocent beauty pressing against him, he could almost forget the trials of this day, of this last week.
Until—
She pushed at his chest, breaking the kiss. “My Lord… I…”
Thomas quickly looked around. Thank God they were alone at the grave. What if someone had seen them? If his brother-in-law had seen the embrace, he’d insist that they marry.
And he would be right.
Thomas swallowed, unable to make rational sense of what he had just done. “I beg your pardon, my lady. I’m so very sorry. I was out of line. Please accept my humblest apologies.”
She touched her lips with her small delicate fingers. “I accept your apology, my lord.” Then she turned, and she ran back toward the estate.
Let her go, he told himself.
But when he turned back toward his father’s burial site?—
“Oh!”
Thomas swiftly turned back around. Lady Patricia had fallen, so he rushed toward her and offered her his arm.
“My lady, are you hurt?”
“No, of course not.” She rose with his help, brushing off her skirt. “I’m only quite the clumsiest person alive. I’m sorry to trouble you.”
“You’re not any trouble at all, my lady. It is I who must apologize again for my?—”
She waved her hand to stop him. “You’ve experienced excruciating loss,” she said. “There is no need to continue to apologize to me. I shall not hold you to anything. My brother will never hear of this.”
A rush of warmth surged into Thomas’s cheeks. “If I were a gentleman, I would go to your brother myself.”
She shook her head. “Please don’t. You’re not yourself today, my lord, and neither is he. He’s distraught because your sister is distraught.”
“My father was against that marriage until he found out your brother was a titled gentleman.”
She nodded. “I’m well aware of the story. And of why they needed to get married in the first place.”
Thomas regarded her sternly. A young lady of the ton should not speak of such things. But indeed, his sister had been with child when she and Cameron married. She was with child before Cameron received his title.
“We should not be conversing about such events,” he said.
“For goodness’ sake, my lord, what is wrong with a young lady knowing about how life works?” Patricia frowned. “My own parents were in the same situation at one time.”
In spite of this day—in spite of his loss—his groin reacted again to this young lady. The last thing he needed was his groin reacting to anything. He was faced with a year of mourning—a year he’d give his father without hesitation—which meant no season, no dalliances with young ladies. And certainly no dalliance with this young lady—Cameron’s sister and a young lady of the ton.
As he watched her with an intensity that bordered on obsession, Thomas tried in vain to push away the forbidden thoughts that crept into his mind. He couldn’t help but wish she wasn’t his sister-in-law, desiring instead that she were just a stranger he could freely want without consequence. Perhaps take to his bed for one simple night of all-consuming hedonism.
But as he stood there, mourning the loss of his beloved father and struggling against these forbidden desires, Patricia’s stance changed. She whipped her hands to her hips in a gesture so reminiscent of his headstrong sister Lily that it made his heart ache.
The same defiance and free spirit radiated from Patricia, just like it had from Lily before she married the Duke of Lybrook—a man who had seen past convention and society’s expectations to appreciate Lily’s talents as an artist and writer. A man who allowed her to live the Bohemian life she craved while still being married to him.
And now Patricia embodied that same spirit, causing a turmoil within Thomas that he couldn’t control. She was everything he shouldn’t want yet everything he desired. She was wild, free, and beautiful beyond measure. And as he gazed upon her with longing and inner conflict, Thomas knew deep down that she could never truly be his, regardless of how much he wanted her to be.
He held up his arm to her again. “This time I’m going to have to insist on escorting you. I wouldn’t want you taking another tumble.”
She scoffed at him. “As you wish, my lord.”
