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“It means something to me,” I whisper, and his face softens right before he circles the nape of my neck with his big palm. When he pulls me forward, touching his lips to my forehead, my stomach dips.
“I’m gonna go shower. When I get out, I’ll call the office and make breakfast.”
“Do you know how to work a stove?” I ask as he lets me go and stands up straight.
“We’ll find out,” he mutters, walking to his bag while I laugh. After taking out some clothes, he heads across the cabin, and I lose sight of him as he disappears into the bathroom.
Climbing out of bed, I go to the kitchen and use the single-cup coffee maker to brew myself a mugful, then take it to the front door and open it. I don’t know what time it is; there isn’t a clock in sight, and I didn’t check my phone. But I’d guess it’s early since I can see the mist coming off the water, the sun isn’t very high in the sky, and the air still holds a slight chill. I grab his sweatshirt since it’s within reach and slip it on, closing the door behind me before I bypass the two rocking chairs and pad across the wooden deck to sit on the steps.
As I sip my coffee, I watch a family of deer come out of the trees across the water and hold my breath as they drink from the pond. When I hear the door open behind me, I look back at Roman and place my finger against my lips, silently telling him to be quiet, before motioning for him to look at where the deer are now watching us after obviously hearing the door open. Surprisingly, they don’t run off. Even when he comes to sit down next to me, they do nothing more than turn their ears in our direction. Maybe they’re used to encountering humans out here and don’t think we’re a threat. Whatever it is, the moment feels surreal.
“I bet you don’t see a lot of deer in New York.”
“No, we don’t.” He takes my coffee from me and takes a sip. “The first time I even remember seeing a deer was when I was ten.”
“Ten?”
“Yeah, I begged my parents to send me to a sleepaway camp for the summer,” he replies quietly. “I had no clue what the fuck I was signing up for. I just knew that friends of mine were going, and I didn’t want to miss out.” He chuckles. “None of us knew we would be sleeping in cabins without electricity and in the middle of nowhere. All of us grew up in the city. None of us had experienced any kind of real nature or wildlife.” He looks over at me. “Our first morning, there was a baby deer in our cabin. It had come in through the screen door while we were all sleeping, and it scared the shit out of us.”
“A baby deer?”
“A baby deer,” he confirms. “But you’d think by the way we all reacted that it was a grizzly bear.” I laugh, and he smiles. “The camp counselors made fun of us for days after that.”
“I bet they did.” I grin.
“That was one of the best summers of my life.”
“You never went back?”
“No, I wasn’t able to.” He passes me my coffee. “Did you ever go to sleepaway camp?”
“No, my summers when I was old enough were spent helping my mom on the farm.”
“You guys had animals?”
“Horses, a few cows, a couple of goats, and some chickens. When Mom got sick, she sold them or gave them to her siblings because she couldn’t take care of them anymore.”
“Where was your dad?”
My insides seize while my hands around my coffee mug tighten.
“He hasn’t been in the picture for years, not since I was young.” I push up to stand, then turn and start up the stairs.
“Elora.”
“I’m going to go shower,” I tell him over my shoulder, heading into the cabin without waiting for him.
I hear him close the door while I take my empty mug into the kitchen and place it in the sink. When I turn around, I find him watching me, but he doesn’t say a word or ask me any questions even though I can see he wants to ask a million of them as he follows me with his eyes.
“When I get out, I’ll help with breakfast,” I mumble, walking to my bag to dig out my shower stuff and something to wear.
Getting his quiet “sure” in return, I walk into the bathroom, then shut and lock the door before I start the shower.
Taking a seat on the edge of the tub, I stare at the door, wondering if I should have just told him about my dad. About how he’s in prison for murdering two women and the abduction and attempted murder of another.
I should.
I should give him the choice of staying or going, knowing I have the same DNA as the worst kind of monster, a liar, and a master manipulator.
