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“To Chance we’re fake dating.”
“But to you?”
Pressure builds in my chest at her question. It should be fake dating to me. I shouldn’t have any feelings for Chance what-so-ever. He’s a playboy cowboy with a reputation of burning through women faster than an eight-second ride.
“I don’t know,” I finally blurt out, taking a moment to gather my breath before raising my head to look at her.
Thankfully, I don’t see any judgement on her face. I see the look of a woman who’s genuinely concerned, and a little confused—which, I don’t blame her.
“Can you start from the beginning? How did you get into this?”
So I do. I tell her about running into Chance at the bar, about Laughlin, about everything. Including our weekend together after the gala. I pour out things I haven’t told anyone; things I haven’t even admitted to myself. Like how when he’s not pissing me off, he’s the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. How there are traces of humour in him that I don’t think he lets many people see. I tell her that from what I’ve seen, he’s a really smart businessman and loves his ranch, and his employees—even though he would never admit to that.
“Well, I don’t think there’s any confusion here. You’re in love with him,” Ella says with a smirk.
“No, I can’t be in love with him! We have an end date. This will be over after this weekend and then I’ll never talk to him again.”
“But do you have to?” she asks, watching me.
“If I’m in love with him, I would kind of need to still talk to him, Ella.” My eyebrows draw together, and I can feel the ‘WTF lines’ on my forehead forming.
“No, silly,” she laughs. “Do you have to stop seeing him after this weekend? Have you talked to him about any of this?”
“Talk to him,” I repeat slowly, letting the words roll off of my tongue. “About what?”
She rolls her eyes. “About making this not fake. Really, Dakota, for someone that makes a living arguing you’re really not getting this.”
A new wave of panic courses through my body at the mention of telling any of this to Chance.
I drop my head back to my arms and take another deep breath.
“Dakota?” Ella’s voice is soft and comforting as she places a hand on my shoulder.
I didn’t even hear her get up and move beside me. This isn’t like me. I’m usually so observant. It’s my job. This is just another example of how Chance is making me feel like I’m losing my mind.
“Dakota, what’s really going on? Is there a reason you shouldn’t be in love with Chance?”
“Other than his reputation for being a woman-using manwhore who only cares about himself?” I ask between breaths.
“But is he really that?” She gives me a moment to answer, but when I don’t, she continues. “The way you just talked about him, I don’t think he is. Or you don’t see him that way, at least.”
Her hand moves to my back and rubs in calming circles, allowing me to breathe slower and deeper.
“No, I don’t see him that way,” I whisper.
“So, what are you going to do about it?”
Her hand drops as I sit up, looking up at her. The corner of her mouth ticks up in a small, reassuring smile. All of a sudden, the pressure on my chest doesn’t feel so heavy anymore. The release of the burden I was seeking finally coming.
She’s not judging me or telling me that I’m going to ruin my life for loving someone like Chance. No, not someone like Chance. I’m in love with Chance Declan.
“I guess I need to talk to him?” I say as more of a question than a statement.
“I think that’s probably a good idea.” Movement on the other side of the glass by my door catches our attention. “Someone’s here. When you do talk to him, just be honest, okay? I might not be the best person to give advice on love since it took Greyson and I years to figure us out, but I do know that once we were honest with each other, things got a whole lot better.” She gives my shoulder a squeeze before crossing my office and gliding through the door.
I take a moment to breathe, pulling out my phone and checking my appearance in the camera app, making sure I don’t look as ragged as I feel; which thankfully, I don’t.
I know what Ella said makes sense. Just like in a case, you can’t win if you don’t make a good argument, and I know with Chance, any discussion we have about this is going to be an argument.
