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“Well, how long will this go on?”
“I’m afraid I still don’t understand what you mean, Larisa. How long will what go on?”
“Honey, at some point Evan will find someone. Someone else. He’ll also get married. And, most likely, he’ll have children. And believe me, when that happens, there won’t be much space in his life for you. I mean, I can’t imagine his wife liking the idea of Evan helping you undress or cooking for you without his shirt on. So, what’ll happen then?”
My heart sinks to my knees.
I feel as if a pit has opened before me, ready to swallow me whole.
I’ve been so wrapped up in my friendship with Evan, that thought has never even occurred to me.
“That’s just … Evan and I have always been friends—since I was eleven years old. I don’t see why he’d want to replace me,” I reply.
“Sure. But nobody is saying he’ll replace you. Just that he’ll eventually get married and have children. Life … goes on, Em. Were you planning on growing old with Evan? As friends?”
Her question makes me squirm.
I turn away from them because I can feel my emotions getting the best of me. As a result, I pretend to go through a series of bridesmaid dresses that are right behind me. My head is spinning and my heart is so heavy that I don’t even see what I’m looking at. I just need something to do with my hands right now.
“Emmy … are you alright?”
“Let’s just find you a wedding dress, Larisa. That’s why we came.”
“Sure. But are you alright?”
“I’m … guys, Evan is my best friend, alright? I don’t want to go through life without him. That’s all I know,” I tell them, my back still turned, my throat constricted.
“Then why don’t you honor the marriage pact? What’s keeping you?” Jo asks me, her voice laced with compassion.
“You know very well what’s keeping me. We’ve been over this a million times.” I face them again.
Their faces show genuine concern, and for that, I can only be grateful.
As always, they only want what’s best for me.
“Sure. But has nothing changed? In light of everything that’s happened between you and Evan over the past several weeks?”
“Nothing has happened between me and Evan! I broke my arm, he put it in a cast because he’s a doctor, he … helped me undress, and then made me some pasta. It’s not like…” The words get caught in my throat.
I’m about to say: it’s not like he asked me to marry him or something like that, but I realize that’s exactly what happened. In fact, Evan asked me to honor the marriage pact, and I refused.
I look at my friends, unable to say anything else.
“Alright. We won’t press you any further. You know what’s best, Emmy.”
“I mean, I appreciate what you’re both trying to do here, I do. I just … I don’t want to lose him, guys. I don’t think I’d be able to live without him. If we tried and things didn’t work out, I wouldn’t be able to talk to him, see him, text him, call him whenever I want, and it would drive me mad. I’d be unspeakably sad. It would break my heart.”
“That’s true, and we understand,” Larisa says. “But also, what if it did work out?”
“Guys, c’mon. You both know my dating history!” I huff. “None of my relationships have ever lasted longer than six months. I’m not exactly the poster child for successful relationships.”
“That’s because none of those guys were right for you.” Larisa retorts.
“Or there’s something wrong with me.” I sigh.
“Em, there’s nothing wrong with you,” Jo interjects. “You’re an amazing woman who knows her worth! You’ve always had high standards, as you should. But … Larisa does have a point.”
“What do you mean?”
