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“Have I told you lately how great you’re doing and how much I appreciate you riding on a bike and trusting me?” he asked as they took their backpacks and went up the steps.
Kara opened the door for him. “I don’t feel like I’m doing great. Sometimes I feel like I’m screaming inside. But I have to hold it together. Not that I haven’t done this before.”
Inside the cabin, he dumped their packs and found the guns Kara mentioned as she inspected the refrigerator.
“There’s some carbonated water and that’s about it. We’ll have to go food shopping. Phil said there’s a grocery store in town. I really don’t want to be on that road after dark. It’s kind of spooky out here.”
“I don’t, either. Let’s take the truck.” He picked up the phone, heard a reassuring dial tone, and replaced it in the cradle. “Unless you want to relax a little first. We have time. I know riding the bike has to frazzle your nerves.”
Kara’s soft carnation-pink mouth curved into a smile. “It does, but in a way, it’s good. I’m overcoming my fears.”
“That’s good.” He went to the sofa, patted it.
As she sat next to him, Kara’s expression filled with curiosity. “Jace, you introduced me to your father. You never told me he was a biker. Is that why you didn’t want me to meet him when we dated? Why you told me he was dead...?”
He sighed, raked a hand through his hair.
“Yes, and no. It’s complicated. He was dead to me for a long time.”
She leaned back. “I’m listening. I won’t judge you, Jace. Please believe that.”
Too ashamed to delve into his family life, he hedged on telling her. Instead, he launched into an explanation about his profession of choice.
“My old man is a reason why I chose the FBI for a career path. I’ve been trying to find myself for years, babe. It took me a long time to discover what I wanted out of life. Not to get rich and have lots of stuff. People acquire stuff and eventually they want more, always more.”
He stretched out his legs and studied the tips of his shoes. “All the guys I worked with were on the fast track. They were headed to Wall Street, becoming investment brokers. Not me. I didn’t want that. I needed something more, something deeper than the almighty dollar.”
He paused a minute, humbled by her quiet trust in him to tell his story. Because no one ever asked, not even Rafe, and he felt closer than a brother to his boss. She’d changed. Hell, he’d changed as well, hopefully for the better.
“I felt like a robot, a walking, talking artificial intelligence programmed to make money for others and myself. Couldn’t resist the urge to follow a higher calling because I started getting afraid I was losing myself, before I ever really began. That might sound pompous.”
“No, it doesn’t.” She put a hand on his arm, her gaze soft with understanding. “I get it, Jace. I do. After a while it feels like life in the shadows. You feel like a shadow of yourself.”
Maybe they had spent so much time hiding their real selves from each other, being scared of the possible heartbreak and rejection if they shared their deepest desires, that they’d gotten lost in their own shadows.
“After my time in the Army Rangers, I realized I could still have that higher calling. Not work security like a lot of vets did, but actually help nab the bad guys. I wanted to be someplace where I could make a difference, where my life could make a difference before I leave this earth.”
She smiled. “You already have, Jace. You have, more than you realize.”
They found the grocery store and bought enough groceries to last a few days. After loading them into the pickup’s back seat, he called Rafe.
“We made it to the cabin. Parking it here for a few days. No cell service, though, even here in town it’s spotty. Get me up to speed.”
“Nothing yet. Lance was supposed to be arraigned today, but they need to get him a court-appointed attorney and that won’t happen until tomorrow. Think he’s going to cave. Seems like it.”
“Maybe my father can help you with Lance as well. I ran into him at a rest stop in North Carolina. He gave me his bike, but I’m still not entirely sure about him. Why you trust him is beyond me, Rafe.”
Silence for a minute. “Need your location, Jace. Where are you?”
“Someplace safe.” He blew out a breath. “I think someone on your team is in league with the bikers, Rafe. How the hell else could they find us so quickly? Someone had to have planted a tracker on the SUV, which is why I told my old man I needed his bike.”
Rafe swore in Spanish. “Jace, these agents are loyal and they know you. They’re your friends, for God’s sake. No one’s betraying you.”
“I’m not taking chances.”
“Then check in with me every six hours. I have to keep in touch with you.”
Jace shook his head. “Once a day, Rafe. Texting won’t go through. I’ll call you on the landline. You hear news, you contact me. I need to know what’s going on. Gotta go.”
