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“Yeah, Shadows in back. Want me to get him?”
“Nah, If I don’t see him by the time I finish this, I’ll find him.” Spitfire nods and then turns to pour a drink for a customer at the other end of the counter. I sit there nursing my beer as I listen to the bar sounds around me. The low murmur of voices, with the occasional burst of laughter, and behind it all is the sound of pool balls as they clack together from the other room.
I feel a pat on the back, “What brings you in tonight?” I glance sideways as my uncle slides onto the neighboring barstool.
“Just felt like a ride and ended up here.” I give a noncommittal shrug, but the tightness in my shoulders and the forced casualness in my voice betray my churning emotions.
“Humph.” The sound comes out of Sam’s mouth as his eyes narrow on me.
My uncle motions to Spitfire, who sets down a draft in front of him. “So, how are things at home?” He asks casually. I take a deep breath, then admit, “Connor’s in bed with a cold. Anna’s taking care of him.”
A knowing glint enters my uncle’s eyes as he offers a slow, deliberate nod. “Ah, I see,” he rumbles, his voice laced with a quiet understanding that puts me at ease. He takes another sip of his beer, “That’s normally when your dad would come around here.”
I raise my brows at him, “Really?”
He grins and gives me a look from under his bushy eyebrows, “Yep. He said he always felt helpless when one of you boys got sick. He said he felt like he was in the way.” I nod in agreement. “Your mother normally knew what to do. But you know, Bonnie relied on your dad to be there for her. She said it was a shared responsibility raising you three boys.”
We sip our beers silently for a few minutes—no words needed. Then my uncle glances back at me and says with a considering look, “The other times your dad would drop by is when he and Bonnie had a fight. He used to come here to clear his head.”
I glance over at my uncle and give a sheepish smile, then just nod and take another sip of my beer. Sam continues, “It was normally some foolish thing he had said that hurt her feelings. Guys can be plumb stupid when it comes to communicating with women.” He nods his head sagely.
I glance over at him again, “Then what would Dad do?” Sam smirks, “Well, your dad was a bit of a hot head. Like you.” He gives me a nudge, “But, he’d come here to cool off and think things through. Then, after one or two beers, he’d head home.” Sam glances over at me with a wink, “He’d say he was sorry and give her a kiss.” He shrugs, “Always seemed to work for your dad.”
I pick up my glass and drain it. Then I throw a twenty on the bar and turn to my uncle. “Thanks.” He chuckles and states, “That’s what uncles and bars are for.”
Twenty-Two
Anna
It’s late, and I’m sitting in the armchair watching Connor sleep. He looks so young and helpless when he’s like this.
I lean my head back against the wide armchair. I snuggle into it and get more comfortable. I wrap my arms around my legs and pull them against my chest. It’s late, and I’d rather be in bed, but I’m worried because Carson isn’t back yet. I sigh. I hate feeling this tension between us, but I don’t know if I’m ready to forgive him just yet.
I feel the hot sting of tears again, but I refuse to let them fall. Instead, I throw fuel on the fire of my anger as I mutter mockingly, “Besides, I’m not even his friend. No. I’m just an acquaintance…”
He already apologized, and the logical part of me whispers, how should he have introduced you? ‘Hi, this is Anna, my date.’ No, we’re not dating. ‘My girlfriend.’ I grimace. ‘This is Anna, my lover, the mother of my child, whom I just discovered I had. Oh, what you hadn’t heard?’ I shake my head and roll my eyes at my silly internal dialog. But it’s helped soothe my hurt feelings and appeased my anger.
The other reason I haven’t gone to bed is that I don’t know if I should sleep in the master bedroom when things are so unsettled. Should I sleep in the spare room? Won’t that reinforce the wall between us? If I’m honest, I’d rather fall asleep in Carson’s arms than alone in the spare bedroom… I snuggle deeper into the armchair.
I wake up as strong arms, warm and familiar, envelope me before I can even register what is happening. My eyelids flutter open, seeing Carson’s face close to mine as he scoops me up and gently holds me to his chest. He carries me into the master bedroom, shuts the door, then lays me carefully on the bed.
Seeing I’m awake, he softly takes my hand in his, “Anna. I’m sorry. I should have told you… the reason I could never be your friend… is because you are, and have always been, way more than a friend. I desire you too much.”
He squeezes my hand and then gives me an earnest look, “I feel many emotions when we’re together, but being friendly is not one of them.” He takes a deep breath and then says, “As for being my acquaintance - I know I already apologized for that, but I wasn’t prepared to introduce you to someone who didn’t know about Connor.” He looks directly into my eyes so I can see the sincerity in his eyes.
Carson’s words flow over me like a wave, washing away the hurt and leaving behind a glimmer of something precious… a fragile hope for our future.
He gently brushes the back of my hand with his lips. Even that soft touch makes me shiver. His eyes start to gleam, and he leans forward and gives me a sweet kiss.
At least it starts out as sweet. When I raise my arms to pull him down against me, the kiss deepens. Then, as always, just one touch and that small flame of desire is soon a raging inferno.
Suddenly, there are too many barriers between us; we’re both desperate to be naked. He’s pulling my shirt over my head, and I’m trying to pull off his T-shirt. Next, my hands fumble to unbutton his jeans. We help each other as our clothes fly off and land around the room. Until, finally, it’s just bare skin against bare skin. Then he lands on the bed beside me and urgently pulls me on top of him.
“Ride me, Anna,” he whispers hoarsely as he grips my hips and helps position me above him. I lower myself onto his hardness inch by inch until I’m fully seated. We both gasp in satisfaction at the intimate connection.
Then I start to rock against him. I go in a circular motion, slow and steady, and I hear him give a low groan. I throw my head back and feel my long hair cascade down my back.
Carson’s hands reach up and cover my breasts. He fondles them as I continue to move above him. When he lets out another groan, I grin at him. He makes me feel so wanton, so… womanly. Knowing I can bring him to this sexual level is intoxicating. I half close my eyes as I deliberately increase the pace, wanting him to lose control.
