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My eyes go from Paige to our son that we haven’t named yet. She insisted we wait to meet him before we saddled him with a name. I was okay with that. The baby fusses and because I can’t get enough of snuggling, I gently pick him up and move to the rocking chair in the corner.
I rock the sleeping baby, cradling him close to my chest, I can't help but marvel at the miracle of life. He gets squirmy. I stand up, cradling him in my arms.
“You are one lucky little dude,” I tell him. “You have the best mommy. I’m going to try to be the best daddy, but you’re going to have to forgive me if I screw up. I’ll always be there for you. When you go to a party and drink too much, call me. I won’t yell at you until after you sober up. If you screw up and break a window with a baseball, tell me. I’ve got your back, but you always have to be straight with me.”
“I think you’re giving him bad ideas,” Paige says.
I turn to look at her with a grin. “I just want to make sure he knows he can count on me.”
“He knows.”
The following morning, we are on our way home. I probably drove five miles an hour the whole way. I was absolutely terrified. I flew people all around the country but driving my son ten miles made my palms sweaty and my knees shaking.
We get home and put the baby in the bassinet. Paige goes to take a shower while I put the gifts from our friends in the nursery to be dealt with later. We’ve got several lasagnas and casseroles packed in the fridge and freezer from well-wishers.
The various baby paraphernalia around the house is a little much, but it’s part of our new life. I welcome the chaos.
Paige emerges from the bathroom, her hair up in a towel and wearing her sweat and a loose t-shirt.
“Feel better?” I ask her.
"So much better," she smiles. "I think I needed that. What have you been doing all this time?"
I shrug. "Just unpacking, putting things away, you know. Trying to make sense of all this. It feels surreal, having our own little family. Are you hungry?”
“I’m okay.”
“Go sit down,” I encourage. “Rest. Sleep. I’ve got this.”
“I might take a quick nap.”
Later that evening, after a busy afternoon of feeding the baby, changing and comforting him, we were both wiped out. The warm evening air felt good as we sat on the patio of our modest home. The baby monitor was resting on the table between us. I knew we should probably be in bed, sleeping when the baby slept, but I wanted to enjoy the moment.
“Did you ever think this kind of happiness was possible?” I ask her as we gently rock back and forth.
She laughs softly and reaches over to take my hand. “No. But yes. You’ve shown me time and time again you were going to lead me to this kind of happiness.”
I laugh. “I’m glad you’re confident.”
We sat quietly for a few minutes, enjoying the beauty of our backyard. With her trust fund released and my job as a pilot providing a steady income, we've been able to build a life together.
“Are you going to call your mom?” I ask her.
“I am. Tomorrow. I want this to be just us for now.”
“She’s going to want to come to see him,” I say.
“I know.”
“You know I’m okay with it,” I assure her. “Without your mom, we wouldn’t be in this house. I’m grateful to her and I think it’s a good thing our son has a grandmother. But I don’t want to leave her alone with him.”
She chuckles. “Yes. I agree.”
Her father may still want nothing to do with her, but her mother has come around, eager to dote on her new grandson and make up for lost time. Adrian, the man she was once expected to marry, has moved on to someone else. Her father made a few attempts to convince Paige to go home, but it was futile.
“Have you decided what our son’s name is?” I ask.
She took a deep breath. “Taylor. You liked that one, right?”
