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Ilay there staring out the window. Who was I kidding, there was no way I could sleep with what happened earlier hanging over my head. It was coming on 3 a.m. and I needed to try and fix what I could. I enjoyed being around Beck and didn't want to jeopardize what we had…were building…what might be.
I could see now that it was inevitable. From the moment I laid eyes on him I knew he was something special. Even though there was a significant age gap between us, I didn't care. I'd managed to keep on my game with him around. So my concern over him distracting me from my job wasn't as significant as I thought it would be. I was pretty sure we could make something work, that was if we wanted a relationship.
But after last night, how was it possible?
Was Fletch as big a problem as I had originally thought? Was it important how he felt about us being together? Kinda yes and no, but overall no. Not that he had any say over my decisions, even if he had been in my life all as long as I could remember. Naturally, I didn't want to jeopardize our relationship either.
I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow. I needed to sleep. Even with my eyes closed I saw Beck; he was all I thought about. And of course, thoughts of him led to sensual, physical, and emotional yearnings making me want him.
Should I wait until the morning to seek him out? He was probably long since in his bed by now. And where I probably would have been.
Yes, wait until morning. Sleep now and be rested when we talk. I rolled over.
Our night had started so well, and it got better until… anyway, I saw a different side to Beck and ...
"Shit. I have to see him. Now!" I told the empty room and tossed the covers off. The urgency to see him and do my best to make things right was overpowering. I had to go to his cabin.
Now.
I flung open my cabin door and ran out, smacking into Beck. He caught me.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, almost panting in my haste, and heard it come out rather harshly. I grimaced. This was not the way to start something you wanted to fix.
He let me go and stepped back. "I don't have to be here. I can leave."
I shook my head and grabbed his hand. "Get in here." I hauled him through the door and into my cabin. He was clad only in loose shorts and bare-chested. I bit back a moan.
"Tell me why you came?" I let go of his hand.
"Where were you going?" he asked and his gaze bored into mine in the cabin light.
"Enough of playing these games. I don't like this tiptoeing around and dancing from one foot to the other. Life is complicated enough without making it more difficult." I sucked in a breath before continuing, "I was coming to see you."
His eyebrows shot up. "To see me? At this time of night?"
"I can ask the same of you. At this time of night?"
He smiled and I returned it.
"I want to talk about what happened." His smile faded.
I was getting fired and he wanted me gone before morning.
I walked over to the window with the view toward the dock and town lights sparkled off the water. It was a pretty view. I realized I was unsure how to continue this conversation.
"The way you handled yourself last night –
"I know," I interrupted him "I was just –
"Stop there. I know you were just 'whatever'. We need to talk about it."
"Please, I think I should speak first. I saw what was going on and it was a mess. Ineffective and it was just getting worse so I stepped in without giving it any thought." I waited for a response; instead he was quiet. So I took advantage of his silence to continue.
"I have to apologize. I shouldn't have barged in and taken over and I completely understand that it was embarrassing to you. I wanted to help and not undermine your authority."
"Well, you did," he replied but I didn't hear annoyance in his tone and I let out a breath.
"So, are you going to fire me?" I asked and sat on a chair by the window. I crossed my legs and warmed under his gaze.
