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He narrowed his eyes. "Was she rude to you?"
Other than treating her as an escort for hire? "Oh, no. Not at all."
"Then what happened?"
"Nothing." She could see from Declan's face that he was going to march in there and ask his mom what she'd said to Piper. Crap. He was in a grumpy mood, and she had a feeling that if he found out his mom had tried to pay Piper twenty grand to date him, it wouldn’t go over well. She had to give him something else to focus on. "It was just a little awkward."
"What was awkward?"
Persistent much? Yeesh. "When I came downstairs and she realized I'd just gotten out of the shower, she thought that…" She paused, grimacing. She and Declan hadnevereven hinted at anything romantic between them, and it felt weird to bring it up.
Understanding flooded his face. "She thought you and I were involved romantically?"
"Yes!" Yay for men who could pick up on subtleties. Well done, Declan.
He sighed. "Sorry about that. She's on a mission to get me to date someone. Anyone."
"Is she?" Piper asked brightly. "I had no idea. But it was fine. Just a moment of awkwardness, but it's all cleared up." She paused. "She was embarrassed by the mistake, so don't say anything to her. We worked it out. We're good."
Declan stared at her. "You're a terrible liar."
"I'm not lying." She tried to duck around him, but he stepped sideways to block her.
"You’re my tenant," he said, "which makes you my responsibility.What did my mom say to you? Because clearly, it wasn't okay."
See? She was just like his car. A responsibility. Which was great, because he was just an annoying man who ruined her shower and took her money. Exactly as they both wanted it. "I feel like it's not something I should get involved in."
He didn't say anything. He simply waited.
She didn't have time to wear him down, even though she definitely could. She had a bride to reclaim. So, she gave up trying to spare his gentlemanly sensibilities and told him. "Fine. Your mom offered me money to date you for a month and then break up with you."
Declan got a pained look on his face, but didn't seem surprised. "How much did she offer you?"
"Her last offer was twenty thousand dollars, but I got the vibe I could have gotten more."
"Twenty grand?" He swore again and strode a few feet away, his hands clasped on his head. "Did you say yes?"
"God, no. You're my grumpy landlord." Had she been tempted? No. Had she started thinking of him in a way that she never wanted to again? Unequivocally yes. "Dating you would be like dating a plant."
His brows shot up. "A plant?"
"Yeah, like a rose bush. Really pretty to look at, but armed with thorns or hired bee assassins."
He put his hands on his hips. "You wouldn't date a plant for twenty grand?"
"No. I don't need the money that badly." She paused. "Actually, I'd probably date a plant for that much," she admitted. "I mean, how bad could it be?"
Declan grinned. "So, you'd date a plant, but not me?"
"That's correct. Yes. I am not interested in dating humans at this time, especially not ones where there is no romantic spark whatsoever. If we ever kissed, it would probably be like kissing a jellyfish, and who wants that?"It would definitely not be likekissing a jellyfish, but she was going to set her boundaries nicely and give them lots of love.
"A jellyfish?" he echoed. "I'm very offended. I'm a great kisser."
Something flickered inside her at all the kissing talk. "I'm sure you're a great kisser. It's not your skill. It's the lack of chemistry between us. No amount of skill can overcome a complete lack of romantic attraction." Right? Of course, right.
He raised his brows. "Most women tell me I'm a good-looking guy."
Piper started laughing. "Oh, God, now you're just being annoying. You know what I meant! I'm sure you'd experience the jellyfish vibe if we kissed, and I'm also a great kisser. It is what it is. Can you deny it?"
