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Tommy squeezed his ankle. “I get that. I’ve been sad for a long time. Just because Bug is back in my life doesn’t make everything better but having him here helps. He’s helping me find myself again and realize what an idiot I was for pushing him away in the first place.”
“How did you prepare yourself to see Blake again?” Dean sighed as he dropped onto his back, his green hair fanning out behind him. “I don’t think I can handle it if Beau shows up with a date. Shit, what if he does? Then what do I do?”
I met Tommy’s dark eyes and then he climbed up onto the bed with us, so we flanked Dean before we lay down next to him.
“We’re here if you need us,” I assured him.
“Yeah, but what if he’s not alone?” Dean asked again.
“Then we kill him,” Tommy answered so seriously that Dean turned to stare at him until Tommy started laughing. “Geez, relax, I’m only messing with you. That was the one thing I didn’t think of right away. I was terrified of what Blake would think when he saw my face, the scar, of how my career was over. If he had told me he was dating someone, engaged, hell, married? I would have probably...I don’t know.”
I sat up. “You would have what?”
“This is about Dean, Bug, not me.” But the flash of hurt and anger in his eyes told me something else. He had already confessed his depression, PTSD, the nightmares. Would he have done something to hurt himself or worse?
My nostrils flared. “Say it. Say what you would have done if I’d waltzed in declaring my love for someone else when it’s been you the entire time I’ve known you.” But instead of answering me, Tommy simply climbed to his feet, walked out of the room, and left me with Dean.
“Blake, I didn’t mean for that to happen.” Dean once again sucked his lip into his mouth. “You should go after him.”
I flopped onto my back. “No.” I folded my arms across my chest. “Show me your boyfriend.” I glanced over at my guitar player to find him blushing. “Oh, wow, yeah, you have it bad, Frost.” I poked his side. “Show me a cute picture of the two of you.” I rolled onto my side.
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Dean mumbled as he produced his cell phone from his pocket. He unlocked it, then dropped it on the bed.
I stared at the picture. Beau was cute. Dark hair, blue eyes, and I could see a few tattoos peeking out from beneath the shirt he wore. His arms were wrapped around Dean as they sat together.
“Is that the Stanley Cup?”
“Yep.” Dean beamed at me. “Each player gets a day with it. I had no idea when I went to visit him that he would have it. Said he wanted to share his special day with me. Stupid.”
He went to grab his phone, but I stopped him.
I lowered my chin. “It’s not stupid, Dean. That’s a big deal. I’m sure if you asked Jax, he’d tell you the same thing. That’s everything he worked for his entire life right there.” I looked at the picture again. “How old is he?”
“Older.”
“How much older?”
“He’s thirty-eight.” Dean’s ears burned pink as I let go of the phone and he put it away. “I don’t care about the age difference. I like him. We had fun together, and I just... if anything, I just want some closure.” Tears slid down his face and disappeared into his hair.
“Talk to him, Dean. That’s all you can do. Tell him everything you’ve already told me.”
“Right. Easier said than done,” Dean muttered.
Chapter Seventeen
Tommy
Five Years Ago
My face felt like it was going to fall off. That fight had started out innocent enough until that asshole told me to eat dick, and that’s when I’d gotten mad. Hockey is for everyone, my ass. I tried to will my body to go back to sleep, but the pain in my ear wasn’t going away. In fact, I was sure it was getting worse the longer I stayed here. I groaned softly as I tried to sit up.
“Tommy.” Blake touched my chest with the palm of his hand. “What do you need?”
“Pain,” I muttered.
He nodded. “Let me get you something.” He was gone before I had a chance to say anything else, and then he was back again, lifting my head. “Here.”
I realized Blake had a water bottle in his hand as well as some Tylenol. “You’re going to need to rest for most of the day.” He stroked my hair lightly as I took the pills and swallowed them with the water.
