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“Ah,perfectit is then,” he said, before giving her exactly what she wanted.
Much later,as Kadar lay propped on the pillows, with Sarah asleep in his arms, the night breeze drifting in, cooling their naked skin, he realized that something strange had happened. Something which had never happened to him before. He wanted to protect her from himself. Despite what his vizier had told him to do, despite the sense he saw in the advice, he’d acted differently. Why? He had to face the truth of the answer. Because he didn’t want her to be pregnant—not yet anyway. He didn’t want her to be forced into a relationship with him. She needed tochoosehim, not beimprisonedby him.
He wanted her to be able to escape the trap that was being laid for her. Because only then, he rationalized, would she enter it and stay there. And if tonight had shown him nothing else, it was that he wanted her to be with him, night and day, for the rest of his life. It was no good to trap her. He had to make her fall in love with him.
CHAPTER 11
Sarah laughed as her headscarf slipped around her shoulders and her hair went streaming out in the wind as they drove out across the desert to the mountains. Not east as she’d hoped, to where she knew her family—if she had any remaining—would live, but west. But she couldn’t regret it. Not after a night of lovemaking like they’d shared, with the prospect of five whole days ahead with just the two of them. She glanced into the wing mirror. If you didn’t count the security cars which followed them at a discreet distance.
Kadar glanced at her. “Happy?”
“Yes.” She raked her fingers back through her hair and twisted it into submission. “I am.” She reached over and placed her hand on the back of his, which rested lightly on the gear stick. “Especially happy that you somehow managed to get leave of absence from your scary vizier for a week.”
He shifted the gear so that it revved up a steep stony track before releasing it once more as they rolled down into the hammada plains. He didn’t say anything immediately, and she glanced at him, wondering why. His jaw was clenched, and a muscle ticked in it. His eyes were hidden behind sunglasseswhich reflected the monotonous landscape ahead and the bright blue sky.
She pushed herself up the seat. “Why was that, by the way?”
“Why was what?”
She frowned. Had he really not heard her?
“Why did your vizier agree to this trip when you said it had been a struggle just to get a night on your own at the desert castle?”
He shrugged. “He seemed to think a holiday was a good idea. After all, the night at the desert castle hadn’t exactly gone according to plan. Besides, he’s quite capable of running the country for a few days.”
She sat back, satisfied. “Good. His loss is our gain. So, are you going to tell me where you’re taking me?”
“First stop is the royal mountain retreat.”
“A retreat, huh? What kind? A cave with a mat? Some kind of authentic Bedouin experience?” She shot him a cheeky grin.
“You’ll see.”
“Um,” she said, sitting back and looking out the window. “That sounds intriguing.”
“I hope you will find it so. Now, it’ll take about half-an-hour to reach our destination, so why don’t we get to know each other? Fill in the gaps of our lives. Tell me about your life in England. Tell me about your grandfather.”
Her smile faded as she stared out at the stony plains, as she remembered her grandfather and was filled with sadness all over again.
“My grandfather.” She sighed as she remembered his face. The dearness of it. How he’d only ever spoken kindly to her and had looked after her the very best he could. Even if that wasn’t exactly as her friends were looked after. He’d done his best and now she knew how much that had cost him. “He was everything to me.” She swallowed and propped her elbow on the armrestand supported her forehead, rubbing it as the familiar tension took over, like a band tightening around her head.
“I’m sorry. It’s hard to lose someone who means the world to you.”
She gave a grunt and cleared her throat as she tried to disguise her sadness. “Yes. He put me at the center of his world. I can’t say I always appreciated it growing up. Sometimes I wished I had an ordinary mum who’d collect me at the school gates in a cool car, wearing cool clothes and take me to ballet lessons like my friends.” She huffed an amused laugh. “My grandfather didn’t drive. He walked everywhere, and Imeaneverywhere. He’d think nothing of walking for an hour into the city and expected me to do the same.”
“He was a man of this land. Few people drive here. Especially outside the city.”
“I know that now. But then? I felt like a misfit even while I loved my grandfather and defended him when the other girls taunted me with his difference. Withmydifference,” she added bitterly.
“You’re not different here, Sarah. You’re with your own people here.”
She glanced at him. “Maybe my family is from here, but I don’t know any of my relatives. I don’t even know if thereareany, and I was raised in England. So I guess I’ll have to live with always feeling just a little bit different. Alittlebit out of place.”
“Maybe. But my guess is that, if you settle here, you will feel less different, feel you belong. Blood is thicker than water.”
“Meaning?”
“The blood which runs through your veins connects you to this land and, in time, the superficial veneer of western customs will leave you.Thatis my meaning.”
