AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I’m doing fine. Thanks for asking,” I answer sardonically.
Though I should be used to this. Mom always makes everything about her.
She laughs it off while completely ignoring my insinuation. Then, she pauses dramatically, inhaling and holding her breath. I wait a beat, my eyebrows lifting on my forehead. I wait another beat.
“I met someone,” she finally says, her voice elated.
I try to hide my deep sigh as my head tilts upward, and I focus on a few of the stars left behind by the previous tenant. They’re glued to the ceiling of my bedroom. I’ve grown to love the soft glow when all the lights are turned off at night. Somehow, I find them comforting, so I’ve never taken them down.
“Say something,” she demands when all she gets is silence from me.
“That’s great, Mom,” I say, my tone lifeless and dull. “I’m happy for you.”
She huffs again, unimpressed by my lackluster response. “Don’t you want to know about him?”
“Not really,” I say honestly.
There’s a good chance that this man—whoever he is—won’t last more than a few weeks. I learned long ago not to ask too many questions. The couple of men I actually liked that she dated in the past were gone before we had time to develop a meaningful relationship. And most of them weren’t worth getting to know in the first place.
“Well, that’s a terrible attitude to have,” she whispers.
I’ve deflated her happiness, and the guilt starts to dissolve all the protective walls I’ve erected over the years.
“Mom … I’m happy for you. I am.” I pause for a moment, trying to choose my words carefully. “Just try to take this one slow, okay?”
My mom drives me crazy, but I don’t enjoy seeing her hurt. I want her to be happy. But mostly, I want some distance from her. She’s strangled me for most of my life with her drama and absentee parenting, and I am finally living on my own, away from it all. I can breathe for the first time in my nineteen years.
I let her tell me a few details about how they met, but I’m not really listening.
“Mom, I have to go,” I lie after a few more minutes. “I have an Econ test I need to study for.”
“My smart daughter,” she says. “I never got to go to college …”
I roll my eyes as she subtly reminds me of all that she sacrificed to bring me into this world, like I asked to be born in the first place. It’s a relief when we finally hang up the call.
I collapse back on my bed, fully dressed, and stare at the stars again. The late afternoon sunshine is warming the space, shining brightly through the window in front of my desk. The dorm room I share with Oakley is quiet. My bestie is at the coffee shop, studying with Chase. Or studying Chase, more likely.
My phone chimes from its place on my bed, and I hesitate before grabbing it, hoping it’s not my mom, spilling more relationship secrets that I don’t want to know.
Connor: Party tonight at the Sigma Chi house. You in?
The butterflies swirl in my stomach when I see Connor’s name on my screen. Connor Carlson. Starting wide receiver on Sinclair’s football team. We’ve been talking for a while, meeting up at random parties and hooking up a bit. He’s never asked me out on an official date, but he’s texted me to meet up at plenty of parties over the past three months. It’s a fun, no-strings-attached kind of relationship—my favorite kind. I don’t worry when he doesn’t contact me for a few days because I don’t want to be his girlfriend. I don’t care if he’s dating someone else. I want to keep things light and fun—the exact opposite of my mom’s life. I’ll never jump from relationship to relationship like her. Who wants to be tied down to someone? Even a hot athlete like Connor. Not this girl.
Me: Sure. I’ll see you there.
I text Hailey, my friend from across the hall, to see if she wants to go out tonight. I ask Oakley, too, but she rarely wants to be my wingwoman these days. She’s too caught up in domestic bliss with Chase.
Hailey texts me back immediately, saying she’s in. We message a few more times to solidify the plans. Oakley answers in the next hour, but just as I suspected, she has plans with her boyfriend tonight. They’re staying in to watch a movie or something lame like that.
I finish some homework that’s lingering and heat up some ramen for dinner, which is the only thing we have in our little kitchenette space right now.
I take my time, getting ready for the night. I blast music to fill the void of Oakley’s absence and sing at the top of my lungs while showering. After drying my hair, I pull it up into a high ponytail, and apply my makeup. I wear shredded jeans that have more holes than material and choose a tight black top with a scooped neckline and three-quarter sleeves. It still gets chilly at night here even though we’re well into spring. I top the look off with bracelets of different shapes and styles and two necklaces. I borrow a pair of silver hoops from Oakley’s jewelry stash to finish off the look.
I start to grab a jacket but throw it back on the hook at the last minute. Connor can keep me warm tonight.
I lock the front door behind me and leap across the hallway to pound on Hailey’s door. She answers breathlessly after a few seconds, her eyes wide.
“Where’s the fire?” she asks, glancing around the hallway.
