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Give her time.
I had always known there would come a day when I’d be all alone. I knew that was inevitable. But now that I was here… I didn’t want that.
I wanted to be a part of something. Something bigger than just blood and death.
But here I was, left all only with my screaming demons.
Just me and them.
Like it had always been.
50
LOST
RYDEN
Icalled Enzo. I didn’t know what else to do. This was making me crazy. The wind was cold, the night was bleeding dark, and I fucking wanted to crawl back into the bed with her, but I told her I’d be here, and so I would be.
“Have you lost your mind, Ryden?” Enzo said when I told him what happened.
“I think so,” I grumbled.
“So? How long was that? The cops aren’t there yet, so we can safely say she hasn’t called anyone.”
“She was crying, but it was as if she was crying for something else… she was strangely indifferent about me being a killer.” I scratched my jaw with a groan.
She wasn’t outraged or repulsed when I told her I was TAK.
There was no visible reaction of horror or disbelief. Except for the tears, she remained eerily composed, almost as if she had been expecting this all along. She was angry only after I told her I loved her.
I didn’t know what to think about that.
“I still don’t understand why you’d tell her that. You… you were happy with her, idiot. You fucking messed up.”
“Because I fell in love with her,” I said with a growl, banging my hand against the door. “And that’s the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life.”
I loved her, and I wanted her to know the real me, but the way I went about it? It was so fucking stupid.
“And if the cops come?”
“They won’t be able to connect me with any of the murders. There’s no evidence. It’s her word against mine.”
“She’s a reputable ME,” Enzo said with a grunt. “Ryden, if you were next to me now, I’d smack you with the dead body that’s currently lying in the embalming room.”
“Fuck. I made a fucking mess. I know that now, but it’s too late to take it back.”
Enzo readily agreed that I was an idiot without even trying to comfort me.
“How’s Irene?” I asked with a sigh.
“She’s good. I think she already misses Yara, but she’s also stubborn as a mule,” Enzo said with a sigh. “Where the hell did our lives go so wrong?”
I chuckled, despite every fucking thing.
“That day I walked into the medical examiner’s office and told her that her autopsy report was ludicrous, and she told me to shut the fuck up.”
I fell in love when she told me beggars can’t be choosers. I was just too blind to know it.
