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“What were you two up to while we hunted? While we fought and protected you?” Kiar reiterated, and I did not miss the inflection in his voice, the accusation that they had fought for us as we lazed about.
“Why offer to hunt for us if you’re pissed off now? And if it wasn’t obvious, I was dying. Clem confirmed as much. He needed mana, and so did I, so we shared,” I said, not elaborating on the obvious, that we had “mated” to make more mana while we waited for them to return.
Kiar hissed, his pupils narrowing, and my mouth flapped. I was unable to reconcile why he was so mad.
He was like this the first time when he dragged me away from the hellish pit to have his way with me. And I liked it, thoroughly ravished yet equally confused by his fury back then, just as I was now. It was almost like Kiar was jealous, which was absurd.
And yet…
“I can be free with my body only with you? Is everyone else off limits now? Even Bracken and Clem?”
The series of questions seemed to throw him off as he backed down, resting on his curled tail, breathing hard.
I didn’t know if he wanted to hit me or kiss me. Maybe both.
But Kiar didn’t enjoy doling out pain like the batbeast in our posse.
No, he seemed to be more of a controlling lover, not one that liked to fight just to fight. And then, it dawned on me why he wanted to quarrel.
“What? Is this because I said no more sex? We have to adapt out here to survive and again, I was dying! You’re no better than Bracken, sometimes, trying to control me,” I grunted, turning away to attend to my weapons again now that my meal was ruined.
Kiar looked stricken, as if I’d slapped him. A look of betrayal washed over his regal features, and it pissed me off even more.
At least Bracken had his nature to blame for being such an insufferable oaf at times. But Kiar had no excuse for how he was acting right now.
Nagas were the strategists, cold, hard, logical. Why was he acting like an impassioned fool over some fucking when it was a matter of life or death for us?
“I’m not your possession. I’m not your damn pet! Clem was on the verge of collapsing and refused to hunt, and so was I, unable to provide. And you two took too long. It’s almost nighttime already and the sun was only beginning to set. Ugh! Why am I rambling on like this anyway? Why am I explaining myself to you in the first place?”
I wanted to yank my hair out. I shouldn’t need to explain any of this to Kiar. But I felt the need to anyway.
He was hissing, quietly seething.
We were still in a quiet stand off when Bracken and Clem returned, and we decided it was time to rest.
Kiar refused to talk or even elaborate on why he was so pissed. The naga prince kept himself away from the group, fuming until the moon was high in the sky all night.
It was only when Clem suggested he join us that I gave up trying to reconcile with Kiar that night. I slept on Bracken’s broad chest tucked against Clem, tired, and more than anything, dumbfounded by our heated exchange.
But then, I awoke when the moon and stars had already chased away the sun. When I opened my eyes again, Kiar had disappeared and was nowhere in sight.
Panic shot through my veins as I dislodged myself from my nocs to go after him, then hesitated, changing my mind once again.
“Mo… Kai…” I paused, turning back to see Clem twitching and muttering, folded into Bracken’s wing.
He was having odd vivid night terrors as of late. I bit my bottom lip, torn between helping him, and going after Kiar. I shouldn’t need to go after him at all.
The naga should learn to deal with his emotions on his own, I decided. Just as I wasn’t his pet, I wasn’t his keeper. We were tied together, in life and death. I had to draw the line somewhere.
Yet, I was aware of the hypocrisy of my actions as I crawled back in against Clem’s back, lacing my arms under his wings to comfort him.
“Where were you going?” Bracken asked. “Need to piss?”
I shook my head. I hadn’t consumed enough food or water to need anything like that in too long, I realized. Clem truly was the only thing keeping me alive. They all were with this twisted bond we shared.
Bracken petted my head and then fell back asleep, but my mind was racing.
I couldn’t let Kiar drift from us. If something happened to him…
