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“Few and far between,” Angela tells him from the cheery yellow upholstered armchair. I have two reading chairs placed in the corners on either side of the room, mostly because Angela had a habit of calling dibs back when I had only one. Thank goodness I grew up with a mother who knows how to thrift. “We’ve been to a couple together, but only the ones in Austin. We don’t have the kind of time or money to drop everything for a Dallas or Houston event.”
“So, you can only get signed books at these events?” he asks.
“Sometimes you can order signed copies from bookstores or author websites. I’ve also scoured Depop far too many times looking for them,” I tell him. “But if I already own a copy, it’s not worth buying a second just for a signature. No matter how many times I’ve been tempted.”
“Except when you donate your favorites and need replacement copies,” Angela says.
“What?” Theo’s head snaps up to me. “But these are your prized possessions. Why would you donate them?”
“Because before I did, the most recent YA books my high school library had was the Divergent series.” The proclamation doesn’t land the way it should. Theo tilts his head and shrugs. “Do you know how many years have passed since the dystopian craze died out? No hate to the genre, but you know a library’s in trouble when the most recent books they have are over ten years old.”
“And you willingly give away your own?” He shakes his head. “How much of a saint are you?”
I wave off the compliment. “I’m no saint, believe me. I was just the chubby girl with no friends her own age. All my friends growing up were teachers, library staff, and fictional characters.” I ignore the way his eyes go soft. “I practically grew up in the public library, but not everyone has one within walking distance. It’s especially important for kids that age to have a wide selection of reading material, and to be able to see themselves in the books they’re reading. They need that more than I do.”
I can’t fathom the way he’s looking at me right now, the storm of emotion flooding his eyes. Angela’s staring at him with barely concealed interest. When she glances back at me, her smirk is knowing and teasing at the same time.
“So…” Theo clears his throat, his expression clearing of whatever emotion was previously clogging it. “How many replacement copies do you need currently?”
“Goodreads.” Angela snaps her fingers at me.
“Already on it,” I say, taking a seat behind my desk and booting up my computer. “I’ve actually got it tabbed right here.” I point out the shelf titled Buy Again to Theo. “Ooh, let’s check if Depop has any signed copies.”
Theo reaches out and shuts my laptop closed. I look up at him with my best puppy-dog eyes, frowning. However, he is undeterred by my expression. “I need a book recommendation. Remember?”
Oh, right. That was the whole purpose of showing him my library in the first place.
Angela leaves soon after I find a book Theo might like. It’s not one from my favorites stack because I’ll quite possibly die if he doesn’t like it.
“So, did I pass?” Theo asks once she’s gone. I turn to look at him, eyebrows furrowing in a look of confusion. “Come on. I know a test when I see one.”
“With flying colors,” I tell him. “Angela might be more devastated than I’ll be when all this is over.” His amiable smile drops, setting into a frown. I bite down on my tongue, wincing.
Foot, meet mouth.
“I’m sorry.” I shake my head. “I didn’t mean for that to come out the way it did.”
“Don’t apologize. I get it,” he says, looking down at his shoes. “We knew what this was from the beginning, right?”
“Yeah.” I nod, even though that doesn’t feel true. Because I had no idea I would feel this way when I stare into his glittering blue eyes, wishing for more time. It’s not like we set a deadline on whatever our relationship is now, but it’s going to end, and when it does, I know I’ll be a mess. “Think that space from Alice did you some good?”
“Definitely.” He nods. “I still think she’s making a mistake with my brother, but I’m not going to stand in her way.” He takes my hand, and goosebumps rise on the skin of my arms at the touch. “What about you? Think you’re any closer to getting over Ben?”
“I think so,” I tell him, downplaying the truth for karma’s sake. I’m not sure if I’m completely over him yet, but the other day was a huge step in the right direction. “And I think this rebound is working a little too well.”
“Really?” His voice is low, husky in a way that’s giving me flashbacks to the last couple of days. He pulls me into his arms, hands settling at my waist. Just when I think he’s about to take this a step further, he throws me completely off guard when he asks, “Do you wanna go out on a date with me?”
I take a step back from him, head snapping up to look at him properly. “What?”
“It wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world, would it?” His expression is vulnerable in a way I haven’t seen yet. Which might be the most surprising, since we’ve both been vulnerable in all sorts of ways in front of each other. “I just thought… forget it.” He shakes his head. “Never mind.”
“No, what?” I ask, tugging on his hand to turn him back around. “Tell me.”
“I just thought it’d be nice if we did something different. Spend some time outside your apartment or mine, for once. Isn’t the dating portion equally as important as the sex portion of any good rebound?”
“You may have a point,” I concede. “All right. What’d you have in mind?”
His smile is blinding and incredibly contagious. My own lips quirk up just looking at him, even as my heart pounds faster inside my chest. I can’t tell if its anticipation or dread of the fallout crawling up my spine. But either way, I know without a doubt that when all this ends, I’m going to be miserable.
