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Ava gasps, clutching her chest dramatically, and I roll my eyes.
“—where we were grabbing a game for everyone to play, and we started kind of…reminiscing? I guess?”
“About?”
“Stupid things at first,” I tell her. “Old memories and shit. But then I somehow started on about my first kiss happening in that room, and I just…”
I frown, looking down at my feet as I try to pinpoint what I’d been feeling at that moment.
“I guess it was a lot, you know? Having him in my room like that. It was like the beginning of every fantasy I ever had about him when I was younger, and suddenly there he was, in the flesh. I may have hinted that I wished he’d been my first kiss.”
“Girl,” Ava practically squeals. “Yes. I love this. What did he say?”
“I’m not even entirely sure that he picked up on it,” I say dejectedly.
And why would he? I’ve always been so far outside his radar that I don’t even ping as a possibility.
But the way he touched me…
I can’t rationalize that part. Had it been a surprise? Had I made him uncomfortable? I want to tell myself that the look he’d given me was more than just catching him off guard, but I can’t be sure of that. Which is why my head continues to spin in circles.
“Oh, honey,” she says, her voice dripping with sympathy. “What did you do?”
“Played it off as a joke. I mean, what else could I do?”
“You could have just come out with it,” she suggests. “See what happens.”
“That would be a terrible idea.”
“Would it?”
“Wouldn’t it?”
Ava shrugs. “I mean, the worst thing that happens is he shows no interest, and you both move on and continue being friends, and you can once and for all put all of it behind you.”
“Yeah and be horribly rejected in the process.”
“But what if he didn’t?”
“There’s no way he wouldn’t.”
“But how do you know?”
“Because he’s always going to see me as the dumb kid he knew over a decade ago!”
Ava looks surprised by my sharp tone, and I am too.
“Sorry,” I say quickly, shaking my head. “I didn’t mean to get snippy.”
Ava raises her hands in acquiescence. “All I’m saying is that you’re not that kid he knew all those years ago. You’re a fully grown, hot-as-fuck woman who he’d be dumb as hell not to notice.”
“You’re not…not right,” I mumble.
“You’ve got tits I’d kill for and an ass that won’t quit, babe,” she says. “Plus, you’re, like, sunshine incarnate.”
“Should I be offended by that?”
“Only if you strive to be a cynical asshole like moi.”
