Page 49 of Becoming Selfish


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“Can you turn it up?” he asks, nodding towards the television.

“Really? You’re probably not going to like this show.”

“Like hell, I’m not! I love Schmidt.” He keeps his eyes locked on the TV screen and there’s not an ounce of sarcasm in his voice.

I laugh to myself, shaking my head. He’s wearing me down with his charm, and I find myself beginning to be okay with it. All my instincts to keep him away falter when he’s this close to me. As requested, I turn up the volume before taking a pillow from my bed and tossing it in Eli’s direction, being sure to hit him with it. He doesn’t turn around to face me, but from the view I have of his profile, I spot a grin spread across his lips before he places the pillow on the ground and lays his head on it. He crosses his legs at his ankles and folds his arms across his chest. He looks far too comfortable for a guy who probably shouldn’t be here right now, but I’m glad he is, nonetheless.

Chapter 37

Eli

There is no way that I’m going to admit to Logan that I’ve already seen this season of New Girl...twice. In the same way, I’m not going to admit that I didn’t actually drive here, but instead walked. It’d be way too easy for her to kick me out if I told her.

I didn’t know what else to do besides show up here and see if she’d forgiven me yet. I texted her multiple times with no response. Marc rolled his eyes at me when I asked him to double-check that he sent me the correct number. I started drinking as a way to distract myself, but it didn’t work. It only made me think of her more as I found myself, once again, making the walk to the grad dorms.

She still seems somewhat upset with me and hasn’t spoken a word since I sat down, but we’ve already watched three episodes, and she hasn’t asked me to leave yet. There’s no way in hell that I’m going to be the one to bring it up. Maybe she’s beginning to forgive me, and perhaps she wants me here. I decide to test my theory.

“You know, Logan, it’s rude to make your guests lie on the floor,” I teasingly guilt her, hoping she will allow me to sit on the bed with her.

“You’re not a guest. Guests are welcome,” she responds harshly though I think I detect a playful tone in her words.

I turn to look at her, hoping eye contact will help my case. “C’mon Logan. It’s uncomfortable down here. Let me just lie on the bed.”

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head at my obvious desperation. “Aren’t you sober yet?” She tries to suppress her smile, but her dimples are making their appearance regardless.

“Nope, still drunk,” I state with a sly grin on my face. I’m not really drunk anymore, but I don’t want to give Logan any reason to make me leave.

She laughs under her breath at my blatant fib. “I know you’re full of shit right now, but fine. Stay on your side of the bed, though.” She tries to sound stern, but the slight tug at the corner of her lips gives her away.

Proudly standing up, I grab the pillow off the floor and toss it back on the bed. I begin to climb over her body, to the other side, being sure to take my time and admire her as I do. I pause midway, with my hands on either side of her shoulders, flat against the bed, and my legs straddling hers. I haven’t had much of a view of her since the room was so dark, but now, hovering over her, I can see her in all her glory. She’s stunning, somehow even more beautiful than she was last night. She doesn’t have a stitch of makeup on, and her hair is down in its natural wave. She’s just wearing an old sweatshirt and a pair of shorts, but she looks absolutely perfect. My lips part as I allow my gaze to wander, taking in every stunning inch of her body.

She must notice me taking my time climbing over her because when my eyes finally make it to her face, she’s knowingly shaking her head at me and trying to suppress a smile.

“My bad,” I tell her in my most seductive voice with my lips only inches from hers. I give her a devilish smirk and unwillingly make my way to the other side of the bed.

She chuckles and shakes her head again as she says, “You’re hella dumb,” in a playful manner. The fact that she doesn’t give into my typical advances is frustrating but intriguing.

“Hella? Watch out Logan, your northern Californian is coming out,” I tease from the opposite side of her bed as I continue to use my charm to try and break down her walls.

As we continue to watch the show, my focus shifts to her body that is now less than a foot from mine, and I feel calm for the first time today. I didn’t realize how exhausted I was from my lack of sleep last night and the stress I’ve been feeling, wondering if Logan would ever speak to me again. Now that I’m here, in her bed, with her so close, I can finally relax.

I turn to lie on my side, facing her, partly to be more comfortable, but mostly to have a better view. Her arm is casually draped in the space between us, and I can almost feel the warmth from her body, even from here. Deciding to test my luck, I cautiously move my hand to touch her. I place it on her tanned forearm and gently hold on to her, needing to feel her. She doesn’t even flinch or try to move away, and I feel like the luckiest son of a bitch in the world because of it. I release an embarrassingly loud sigh of relief, feeling her warm skin against mine. My body begins to melt into the mattress from the calm that her presence brings me, and I don’t even finish one more episode before I find myself drifting off to sleep.

Opening my eyes, I expect to find Logan next to me, but she’s nowhere to be seen. Glancing down at my empty hand, I begin to wonder where she is and how long I’ve been asleep. I reach into my pocket for my phone to check the time. It’s 2:15 in the morning. The light from my screen illuminates the room just enough that I can see rustling on the floor.

“Logan?” I whisper.

“Yeah?” she responds, confirming that she left me in the bed alone to sleep on the floor.

“Why are you sleeping down there?”

She doesn’t answer, so I continue. “You shouldn’t be sleeping down there. Let me. I don’t want you on the floor.” I begin to sit up and swap places with her.

“It’s fine, Eli,” she tells me as she remains still on her makeshift bed.

She’s so stubborn. I don’t know how many times I’ll have to ask her to sleep in the bed for her to actually do it. I have to force myself to keep from going over and picking her up, throwing her over my shoulder, and placing her in the bed myself. But I know the real problem is not her stubbornness, but the fact that I have yet to apologize for my behavior at the party.

“Logan?” I lie back on her bed with my eyes focused on the ceiling.

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