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As I walk out into the early evening heat, I nod towards my crew who have blended into the surroundings. The car is waiting. I can go back to her and the old family house and relax. My ‘meeting’ with Randazzo is planned for tomorrow. He might already know that I’ve landed. That a Scalera has entered his sacred Sicilian territory. He could preempt me by killing me before we can ever meet face to face. In fact, I know this is what the Don would do. Kill first and don’t bother to ask questions. I might come in ‘peace,’ but Randazzo didn’t get where he is today by taking things at face value.
I don’t trust myself around Tasha, not after what happened earlier, and her sassy promises, promises she threw at me. That mouth needs cock and will get it if I don’t hold back. I won’t be able to stay away from her, and that’s what I need now. Distance. Going back to the house, even with all those empty rooms, isn’t an option.
The night is young, and so am I. Fuck, this might be the last night I’m alive. Shit could go south tomorrow, and I’m not bulletproof.
I get into the back seat and lean over to the driver. “Take me to a night club.”
“What type of night club?” the driver asks, his eyes meeting mine in the rearview mirror. “It’s a bit early.”
“One with strippers and other services.” The type of club that doesn’t keep hours and the last type of club a newly married man in love should be visiting. Not that I care. I’m only living up to my reputation.
May the word spread so that the Sicilian can know I’m the real deal.
30
TASHA
It must be midmorning already. The sun has been up for hours.
And still no sign of my husband. He’s been gone the whole freaking night and I’m not ready to face any of the staff. What would they even be thinking? First night on honeymoon and the husband is missing in action.
When Matteo left, I thought he was only going to be gone for a few hours. At first, I was shy to look Burley in the eye when he came to my room with a new dress and some PJs. He knew exactly what had happened and who knew what Matteo had told him as he left.
Burley brought some snacks and tea to my room and later asked me if I wanted to have dinner on the veranda. That was a guilt-lined invitation. Even he felt embarrassed that Matteo had left me to my own devices. I grasped at the opportunity, and even though Burley’s conversation was sparse over dinner, it was better than nothing. I couldn’t even lure him out when I asked him how he met Rosalia.
After dinner, we walked to the end of the garden, to the small wall with the ocean below to look at the sunset. I felt like a target. Guards watched my every step. The sea seemed a bit wilder, as if the tide was coming in with the wind sweeping against my skirts. There wasn’t much else to see, except the boat lights out on the dark water. Proof of other people. Safe people. Normal people.
Everything is controlled. I have access to nothing but what I need in the moment. It’s driving me nuts. I’ve never felt more isolated in my life.
Burley bid me goodnight, but I rolled around in bed for a long time, waiting for Matteo’s return. For a sign of life. I know I’m not the first order of business for him, and that he has a vendetta to come and settle. But what if he gets killed in the process? At that thought my heart thumps against my ribcage, as if there isn’t enough space for it, and tears burn at the back of my eyes.
Matteo has wrestled with death a few times and come out alive. I must have more faith. On that first day, every cell in my body wanted him dead. Now? He’s become human. My connection to the outer world. I’m locked up here, and what will happen to me if Matteo is dead? Burley, without a doubt, has instructions to deal with me.
I’m just merch, and when the merch goes off, well, you write it off and toss it. I’m as good as dead and I’ve known this for a while, but I still have fight in me.
A knock on my door forces me to sit up. I’m tired from restless sleep, waiting for a husband who isn’t real, worrying over a man who plans to kill me.
“Tasha,” Burley’s voice sounds through the door. “Breakfast.”
“Okay.” I get up and take a quick shower, then put on the same dress from yesterday. If breakfast is served on the veranda, then I’ll take it. I’ll do anything to get out of this room and the confines of the boredom that comes with it.
When I try to open the door, I find it unlocked. Burley is waiting outside and as he studies my face, I know exactly what he sees. Dark circles under my eyes from worry over a man who isn’t worth it.
“Where’s Matteo?” I ask.
“He spent the night at a hotel.” Burley drops his gaze, but I’ve started to learn what his little signals mean.
He’s embarrassed about the situation and doesn’t agree with it.
“Don’t tell me he was with another woman,” I murmur, rage and jealousy boiling up in me in equal measure.
“I don’t know. Could’ve been women.” He looks down at me, his face stern. “What’s it to you in any case?”
I shrug, pick up my shredded dignity and walk down the corridor to the stairs. Burley falls in step next to me, matching my pace. He doesn’t touch me, doesn’t command my body like Matteo would have at this point. I miss it. I miss him. And I’m jealous of whoever had the pleasure of getting served a Matteo Scalera orgasm last night. Or two. Or three.
I’m properly pissed by the time I sit down at the table we had dinner at last night. The pool is sparkling blue in the bright sun, the roses’ perfume drifting over in the slight breeze. This place is idyllic. My seat faces the ocean and from here the slope of the manicured lawn to the small wall is almost inviting a sprint. My body is anxious with bottled-up energy. I usually exercise every day, be it a run or swimming laps or doing a class at my local gym. I’m fit. Fit enough to take the plunge.
I’m dead either way. That jump isn’t that high. And when you’re between a rock and a hard place, your choices are limited.
