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“Look, I understand that all of this is difficult to process. For both of you…but we have to figure out a way for the two of you to trust each other. If not, Amber will win. And since she wants to kill the woman I love, I’m going to do everything I can to prevent that. I need you both to get on board,” I order. I’m not usually so outspoken, but this is Garnet’s life we’re talking about. And I value that even more than I do my own.
“But we need to focus on saving you,” she insists.
GARNET
James makes a face at my comment, while Trevan simply looks disinterested. I hate that his lack of interest bothers me, but it does. I tell myself that I don’t need his approval, and I know it’s true. I don’t need it, but I want it. My heart aches at the thought that he doesn’t care what happens to one of the men I love.
I want his help, but not at James’ expense. If I have to take Amber on by myself, I will. And I’ll find a way to defeat her, even if it kills me. As long as my mates survive. I don’t want to leave them, but I would rather give my life than sacrifice one of theirs.
“We don’t have time to debate this. Please, Garnet, let Trevan help you with your powers. Then maybe he can help us get back home and you can save me.” James’ plea grips my heart. I want to argue with him, but I can’t. The pain in his eyes is too much for me.
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” I turn to my father. “It would mean a great deal to me if you would help me learn to use my powers so I can fight Amber and save James. Please.” I’m not above begging, but I hope it doesn’t come to that.
Trevan stares at me for a long moment. “I always planned to help you. I wanted to explain everything once you had a chance to learn more about me and this land. It was never my intent to lie to you. I kept the secrets that your mother wished me to, but only to protect you. There were forces searching for you even as a child. We had to make them believe that you were gone like your mother. It was the only way.”
I don’t know how to feel about his confession. Is he being honest with me? I have no way to tell. I’ve just met this man, and he’s asking me to trust him. I’m not sure I can. There’s no choice in working with him or not. I must work with him, or I’ll never learn to control my magic. I can’t risk the wolves, vampires, and even humans that way. It’s up to me to rescue them and keep them safe. If only I knew how.
“I can’t force myself to trust you. I want to, even though I don’t understand that pull. But I don’t know you. I hope that doesn’t offend you. I will work with you. I’m smart and learn quickly. When I’m trained enough to take Amber out, I do trust that you’ll send us back to deal with her. And if you can help us save James, I’ll expect that as well.” My words sound cold and calculated, but they aren’t meant that way. I just can’t express myself here, not to the father I’ve never known, not in a strange place that oddly feels like home.
After a few more minutes, Trevan excuses himself, leaving James and me alone for the first time since we arrived here. “Thank you, for being civil to him. I understand that you’re upset. You have every right to be. But I think he’s being honest. He just wants to help and doesn’t really know how.” James speaks softly, then pulls me into his arms.
I sink into him, enjoying how real and permanent he feels against me. I know it’s only because we’re in this strange reality, but I let myself believe that he’s going to be okay. Here, I can pretend that we’re just taking a vacation. It’s easy to ignore the fact that at this very moment, people who care about us are worried that I’m never coming home and James is dying.
The thoughts come unbidden, ruining our perfect moment. I want to push them away again and focus on us, but I can’t. Tears start to fall, and he wipes them away. “Garnet, it’s okay. I’m sure they’ll figure out how to save me. Please just focus on learning about your magic. I’m not going anywhere.”
Even as he says the words, I know they’re lies. I can sense it along our bond. Even though it’s weak and we can’t communicate with it, I can still feel his emotions. He knows that this doesn’t look good for him, but he’s encouraging me to stay here, with my father, and work toward our original goal. We have to defeat Amber. I understand the desperation of it.
I feel the same as he does, but I cannot sacrifice him to get there. I won’t. I’m tired of fighting, so I don’t say anything. Instead, I press my lips to his and kiss him, pouring my emotion into the connection between us. I can’t lose him. I’ll fall apart if I do.
Panic grips my heart, even as James’ love nearly drowns me. I kiss him as if this is the last time I’ll ever have the chance. I want more, but when I reach for him, he backs away. “Not like this. Not to say goodbye. I’m not giving up.” His words cut me, and more tears fall.
I can’t argue with him, because he’s right. If I make love to him now, it’ll be me saying goodbye. I don’t want that any more than he does. “I agree. This isn’t goodbye. And if I have to wait until we save you, then I will. I’m not giving up, either.”
With our vows made, we sink into a comfortable silence. I fall asleep almost as soon as my head hits the pillow. My dreams are strange, but not the same as usual. I don’t dream of the forest or the witches’ circle. Instead, I dream of playing in a field with my mates. Where I expect darkness, all I see is light. I can’t help wondering if the Moon Goddess is trying to give me a sign.
three
Absentee Father
RYLAND
Orym, you need to answer me now, or I’m going to bring the entire extended pack to find you. What on Earth is he doing that he can’t tell me where he is?
I’m sorry, Ryland. I’m currently hiding in a tree from the witches who are searching for me. I don’t know how many of them are out there, so I would rather not tell you where I am right now. I’m trying to keep you guys safe. Orym’s soft voice in my head pisses me off. I don’t care that he’s done something stupid and feels like he has to hide it from me.
I need to know where you are. Please, just tell me. I promise we’ll wait a while before we come to get you. I’ll give you a chance to get out of it yourself and come home to explain. I have no bargaining chips here. All I can do is hope he tells me.
What the hell is it with these people? Hiding things and keeping secrets seem to be the standard now for my pack. That’s not going to get any of us anywhere. But how do I get them all to understand that? Maybe being the leader isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Well, it’s too late to change my mind now.
I, uh, took a slight detour. I’m over by the waterfall. I was going to explain when I got back. It didn’t make sense to look for Garnet somewhere else. I’m sorry, Ryland. I’ll be home as soon as possible. You can yell at me then. The audacity of this guy. I make him my second in command, thinking he’ll be the one to uphold the hierarchy of our pack and set a good example. Then he goes and pulls this shit?
We will definitely be talking about this when you get home safely. I let my annoyance flood the bond. I want him to know that I’m pissed, and I won’t soon forget that he disobeyed me like this.
With that settled, I turn my attention back to James. He looks paler, with those dark magic lines covering more of his leg. “Is there anything we can do to slow it down at least?” I ask. I’m certain that she’s already explained this once, but I wasn’t listening.
Grammy glares at me. “I’m working on it. I’ll let you know as soon as I have something useful to offer. For now, you should figure out where Orym is and make sure he’s safe.”
“He’s fine. I’m giving him a chance to make it back on his own.” I pause at the raised eyebrow she offers me. “I’ve spoken with him through the mate bond. He’s avoiding capture, but he isn’t where he was supposed to be. I will deal with that when he gets home. Please keep working on James. We need him healed so we can find Red. We can’t beat Amber without her.”
