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“I can’t get her up. She won’t respond. Where did Grammy go? We need her,” one of the voices near me says. The pain is so bad that I can’t even tell which one of my mates is talking. Did Grammy leave? I wonder if that means that Trevan left too. I’m glad they’ve found each other. They deserve to be happy.
I really should get up. But I can’t. I try to force my limbs to move, but they won’t. Pain tears through me again, and I know that James has left the forest. The last tether that connected us has torn apart. He’s gone, and all that remains are the scars his love left on my soul.
I’ve been so worried about protecting him, that I never considered how badly he could hurt me. Human or not, what he’s done to me is unforgivable. What is wrong with me? How can he just walk away like that?
Even his explanation of why makes no sense. I would never wish for him to leave. I want to keep him safe and near me. But I can’t do that now. I have to let him go. Even if it kills me.
I barely register the new voice I hear in my head. You chased him off. Always putting him in danger and never considering how fragile he was. The thoughts echo in my head. The voice is familiar, but I don’t know who it belongs to. I shrug it off, figuring it’s the numbness setting in. I can’t afford to care about anything right now.
If I don’t get a handle on my emotions, someone is going to get hurt. I feel my magic swirling around me, and I finally tune in to the conversation I’d been ignoring.
“We have to get through to her before she destroys the forest.”
“I know, but she’s not responding, and her magic is going nuts.”
“Red! You need to come back to us. Now. This isn’t the way to deal with James and the pain he’s caused.”
I know that the voices are right. But I can’t make it stop. I need the pain to stop. There has to be a way. I just have to figure it out.
That’s right. Push the pain down, lock it away. You must be rational now, or you won’t survive this. The heartbreak is too much. You should just give yourself to Amber so she can make the pain stop.
The voice is very convincing. I shake my head, pushing my emotions down. I lock the pain away, refusing to acknowledge it. I have to make it stop.
“Garnet, please. Come back to us. We love you.”
“Red, you can do this. Get your magic under control and come back to us.”
“We’re here for you, but you have to breathe. If you don’t calm down, you’re going to kill everyone.”
The anguish in those voices pulls me back. It’s not just my bond with James that’s broken. They all had bonds with him too. I’m not the only one hurting, and I have to stop acting like I am. That thought alone is the one that pulls me back together. I have to continue to fight, for these men who stayed with me.
With one final devastating cry, I pull my magic back into me, along with my emotions. I sit up and look at my fated mates. Each of them stares back at me with lost expressions. I can see their pain. But mine is tucked away, no longer visible. I’m hiding it just out of reach.
Standing up, I hold up my hands to stop them from pulling me into their arms. “Thank you for making me realize that this isn’t the time to fall apart. We need to get to work. There’s a lot to figure out before the Wolf Moon comes.” I walk back into the cabin without a backward glance.
I don’t know how long I’ll be able to keep this pain at bay, but for now, I’m okay. I don’t feel anything. Not happy, not sad. Nothing. And that’s just the way I want it. I hear the door open and close behind me, indicating that Ry, Luca, and Orym all followed me inside. I don’t have time to deal with them right now, though. I have to work out a list of spells I can use against Amber. There is no more time to waste on emotions.
LUCA
I hold Red until her magic pushes me away. It rips me off her and tosses me as if I’m the one who hurt her. I don’t know if her magic can tell the difference, or if she just needs space from everyone. I kneel as close to her as I can get without being slapped away again. All I can do is watch as she breaks down even more than she did when she was in my arms.
My heart cracks at her pain. It’s bad enough that James destroyed the mate bond that connects him to me, Ryland, and Orym. But this is too much for Red. She can’t take it. With the buildup of magic, I worry that she’s going to explode.
James storms out of the cabin and races through the forest. Orym and Ryland step out after him, stopping close to where I kneel. The three of us beg our mate to come back to us. She can’t leave us like this. We won’t survive without her.
The way Red switches off her emotions is terrifying. One minute she’s inconsolable, wailing as her magic swirls around her, keeping us away. The next she’s calmer than I’ve ever seen her. She pulls her magic back into her with an ear-splitting cry and stares at us for a moment. Then she stands up, and walks into the cabin, as if nothing has happened.
I look at Ryland and Orym, unsure of what to do. Ryland shrugs, Orym shakes his head, and both follow her inside. I trail behind, moving a little slower. Part of me wants to go after James and bring him back to her. I know it’s pointless now, because he’s already destroyed the bond, and our mate. My only solace is that if my heart aches this badly, his pain must be worse.
That shouldn’t make me feel better, but it does. Knowing that he’s suffering as much as she is, makes me wonder if he won’t come back. The pull of the mate bond is strong; maybe it can be repaired. I stare at Red, now perfectly calm and professional, as she searches her spell books and makes lists of supplies and useful spells that she’ll need to fight Amber.
Orym and Ryland stare at her too. None of us sure of how to approach her. This situation is too much. Her pain can’t be gone, but she looks perfectly at peace. How is that possible?
“I don’t understand,” I whisper. “How did you turn it all off, Red?”
She looks up at me. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Luca. We have work to do. Please, let’s just forget about what happened and move forward.” It’s clear that she doesn’t want to talk about it, and I decide not to push. Maybe she’s right. We should focus on defeating Amber, then worry about getting her other mate back and fixing this.
I just wish I could be confident about our chances.
