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I barely spare him a glance, too focused on Nico. My Nico, my heart, my everything, bleeding out on the filthy concrete floor. I thrash and strain against the ropes binding me, heedless of the way they cut into my skin, the warm trickle of my own blood down my wrists.
"Nico," I sob, my vision blurring with desperate tears. "Nico, baby, hold on. Just hold on for me, okay? I've got you, I've got you, just stay with me."
Impossibly, blessedly, the ropes give way with a snap, the fibers fraying beneath my frantic struggles. I lunge forward, hitting my knees beside Nico's crumpled form. My hands hover uselessly over the ruin of his chest, the horrible wound pulsing with each labored beat of his heart.
"Eli," he rasps, his voice wet and choked with blood. One trembling hand comes up to cup my cheek, painting my skin with the slick heat of his life's blood. "Eli, I'm...I'm so sorry. For everything, for pushing you away, for being so fucking scared-"
"Shh," I choke out, pressing my forehead to his. Tears drip from my eyes to slide down his pale, clammy cheeks. "Don't try to talk, baby. Save your strength. We'll get you out of here, get you to a hospital-"
"No time," he grits out, his breath rattling in his chest. "Need...need you to know. Before I...before..."
"Don't," I sob, my heart shattering in my chest. "Don't you dare say goodbye, Nico Caruso. Don't you fucking dare."
A ghost of a smile flits across his bloodless lips, his fingers spasming weakly against my cheek. "Not...not goodbye," he whispers. "Never goodbye, Eli. I love you, always love you, even...even if I don't...don't make it."
A broken sound tears from my throat, a wail of pure agony. "You will," I rasp, pressing desperate kisses to his face, his lips, his fluttering eyelids. "You'll make it, Nico, because I won't fucking let you die on me. Not now, not ever. We have a whole life to live together, baby. A future to build, a love to celebrate. You promised me forever, and I'm holding you to it."
Nico's eyes flutter open, hazy and unfocused but so full of love it takes my breath away. "Forever," he echoes, his voice a thready whisper. "Sounds...sounds perfect, sunshine. Forever...with you..."
His voice trails off, his eyes slipping shut as his hand goes limp against my cheek. Panic surges through me, a tidal wave of icy terror.
"Nico?" I gasp, patting desperately at his pale, still face. "Nico, baby, open your eyes. Open your eyes for me, please, please don't leave me-"
But he's still and silent, his chest barely rising with each shallow, shuddering breath. The blood is everywhere, coating my hands and soaking into my jeans, the metallic reek of it clogging my nose and mouth.
Distantly, I hear shouting, the thunder of feet on stairs. Nico's men, swarming the building like avenging angels. But it's all background noise, a distant buzz drowned out by the roaring in my ears, the shattering of my heart.
All I can see is Nico, my beautiful, brave warrior, lying broken and bleeding in my arms. All I can feel is the icy grip of fear, the soul-deep knowledge that if I lose him...I lose everything.
"Stay with me," I plead, gathering him close and rocking him like a child. "Stay with me, Nico, please. I love you, I love you, I can't do this without you. Please, baby...please don't go where I can't follow."
The words pour out of me like a prayer, a desperate plea to a God I've never believed in. I'll do anything, be anything, if it means Nico will open his eyes. If it means I won't have to face a bleak, colorless world without his light to guide me.
I press my tear-streaked face to his chest, listening to the thready flutter of his heartbeat. Each precious thump against my cheek is a tiny miracle, a fragile thread of hope in the darkness.
"Come back to me," I whisper, my lips brushing the bloody ruin of his shirt. "Come back to me, Nico. I'm here, I'm right here...and I'll never let you go again. Never, never, never..."
I cling to him like a lifeline, like he's the only thing keeping me tethered to sanity. The world fades away, narrowing down to the two of us, the precious beat of his heart against mine.
And as the shouts grow louder, as the thunder of running feet draws closer...I pray to every god and devil I know that it won't be too late. That Nico will keep breathing, keep fighting, keep holding on to me and the love we've fought so hard for.
Because a life without him...is no life at all. And I'll move heaven and hell, I'll fight through blood and bullets and the very fires of damnation...to bring him back to me.
To bring him home, where he belongs. Forever, and always.
CHAPTER 8
NICO
Pain. It's the first thing I'm aware of as I struggle up from the depths of unconsciousness. A deep, throbbing ache in my shoulder, radiating out through my chest and down my arm. Each breath feels like fire in my lungs, the simple act of drawing air an agony.
But beneath the pain, beneath the fog of drugs and exhaustion...there's a warm, solid presence at my side. A hand clutching mine, callused fingers twined through my own. The scent of green, growing things and sunshine, achingly familiar.
"Eli," I rasp, my voice a sandpaper scratch in my throat. "Eli, are you...are you okay?"
The hand in mine tightens, a choked sob echoing in the quiet room. "Am I okay? Jesus Christ, Nico, you're the one who got stabbed. You almost...you almost died in my arms, you self-sacrificing asshole."
I force my eyes open, squinting against the harsh fluorescent light. Eli's face swims into view, those summer-sky eyes red-rimmed and puffy, his golden curls a wild tangle. He looks wrecked, exhausted, like he hasn't slept in days.
