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My arm remains in his death grip as I stare back at him. And as his lips tilt up in a smile, I sigh. Sometimes, with him, it’s easier to just give in and get it over with.
He successfully pulls me back down to the bed, and I nudge him in the ribs with my elbow. “At least move over. You’re taking up the entire fucking bed.”
Luca moves over, pulling me with him and nuzzling into me like a touch-starved puppy as he wraps his tattooed arm and leg around me again.
And as I lie on my back with his head on my chest, I stare up at the ceiling and try my hardest to fight the urge to push him off me.
He snorts out a laugh. “Wow. You’re fucking awkward.”
My jaw clenches as that urge grows.
“Remember what I said about the tiger’s paws?” He pokes at my arm that he’s lying on, and with a large exhale, I wrap my arm around his back.
“You’re really pushing it,” I mutter.
“And you’re not.” Luca tips his head back to look up at me. “I’m not usually one to complain when you’re stiff, but this just isn’t it, Ty. I might as well be cuddling a statue covered in thorns. Like a cactus statue. Because let’s face it, there’s not too much about you that’s rosy.” He snorts out a laugh, apparently pleased with that joke.
“Well then, we don’t need to be doing this.”
I start to push myself up again, but his hand lands on my chest, pushing me back down. “Yes. We do.”
My eyes close as I take in a deep breath, exhaling slowly to keep my shit together. Just another minute…
And when Luca’s alarm finally goes off, an annoying upbeat pop song blaring throughout the room, I throw the blankets back and get out of bed faster than I think I ever have before.
Luca chuckles as he rolls over to turn his alarm off, humming “Gonna Fly Now” from Rocky.
Ignoring him, I head into Luca’s bathroom and start up the shower. And as I step under the warm spray, I let it wash away the nagging thoughts that have been swirling around in my brain since yesterday.
Andrew Giles prefers a stand-up fight.
A striking fight.
And during drills with Luca last night, after everyone left, I flinched at a fucking feint from him. I knew he wasn’t going to hit me, and I still fucking flinched.
I scrub my hands over my face, pushing those thoughts from my mind for now as I focus on the day ahead. It’s going to be busy at the garage, so I can worry about this bullshit tonight at the gym.
Just as I finish rinsing the shampoo from my hair, Luca pulls the shower curtain back and steps in, handing me a cup of coffee. I take it as I get out of the shower, and his eyes drop to my dick.
“Damn,” he groans. “That would be a good breakfast.”
I grab a towel from the hook and rub it over my hair. “Could have had it if you didn’t waste time cuddling.”
He gives me a hard look as his hand tightly grips the shower curtain. “Cuddling is never wasted time.” His eyes drop to my cock once more as I dry myself off and wrap the towel around my waist. “But we’re fucking hard tonight.”
“Fine by me,” I mutter as I turn to the sink and take a sip of my coffee.
As Luca pulls the shower curtain closed, singing something about having bad blood, my eyes reluctantly slide up to meet my hazy reflection in the foggy mirror.
My whole life, it’s been hard to look into my own eyes. To see emptiness, hatred, guilt, anger… and a complete stranger staring back at me. But over the past few months with Luca, I’ve seen the guy in the mirror wake up, and slowly let go of everything that has controlled him. And I’ve come to know and appreciate who he really is.
But right now, I’m thankful I can’t see my eyes. Because I feel like I’m just one more failure away from losing it all. And I’m not ready for the emptiness to return just yet.
I grab my coffee and head into the bedroom to get dressed. But I groan as I toss yesterday’s gym shirt back into my bag. I forgot to bring another fucking shirt and pair of boxers from home.
“Grab one of mine,” Luca says as he enters the bedroom naked, running a towel through his wet curls.
He tosses me a pair of boxers, and I pull them on then open his closet to grab a shirt. But as my eyes rake over the fucking rainbow in here, I wince. I’d rather wear my rumpled, sweaty gym shirt.
