AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I round the front of the truck and see her heels are stuck in the mud.
“Do you have any boots in the truck?” she asks.
I bend down and put her over my shoulder. Her feet slip out of the shoes, and I pick them up, mud splattering on my slacks. But I don’t care.
“Jude!” she yelps, but she doesn’t fight as I walk to the barn.
“How else would you get there?” I open the barn doors and put her shoes on the wooden floor that’s seen better days but will at least protect her heels from the mud. “Sorry about your shoes.”
I lower her, and her body slides along mine as her feet slip back into her shoes. Our eyes lock for a moment, and as they’ve been doing lately, hers are filled with something different. Lust? Love? I’m not sure, but staring at Sadie feels different now somehow.
Her gaze strays first and she looks past me. “What’s under the tarp? A new truck? I told you, I love my Datsun. It makes me feel closer to my grandma.”
“It’s not a new truck.” I walk over and take the edge of the tarp in hand. “It’s so much better. At least, I think so.”
I tear off the tarp, revealing the mobile pasture-raised chicken coop I’ve been working on the past couple weeks based on some research I did. Sadie doesn’t say a word. She doesn’t scream or jump up and down. Her hands cover her mouth, and she stares at it.
I shift in place. “I followed what I saw online but made some tweaks. I put it on wheels so we can move it around the acreage and let them feed in different spots. We can add?—”
“It’s beautiful.” Her gaze flicks over to me. “This is the best wedding gift.” Sadie walks closer to get a better look and touches every part she comes to.
“We can duplicate it. It didn’t take me long to make it.”
A tear slips down her cheek, and she wipes it away, but another one comes right after, then another. Her back shakes as she cries openly while she walks around the chicken coop, inspecting every inch.
It feels as if someone has cracked open my chest. “Did you want to do it together? Did I overstep?”
She shakes her head, walking toward me as her eyes remain on the chicken coop.
“No. It’s so…” Her head falls into her hands, and she cries even harder.
“Sadie,” I whisper, wrapping my arms around her.
She slides her arms around my waist in a tight grip, inching up on her tiptoes and burying her face in my neck.
I run my hands over her back. “What’s wrong? I thought you’d be happy.”
She nods. “I am,” she croaks, her grip only growing tighter.
“Then what is it?” Panic constricts my breathing, a million thoughts racing through my head—what’s going on, what can I do to fix it, can I fix it?
Her heels fall to the floor, and she unwinds her arms. She wipes her tears with the backs of her hands. “It’s everything. This.” She points at the chicken coop. “I can’t imagine doing this with anyone else, but I didn’t think that my dad wouldn’t be here for my wedding. That I’d have to ask my mom to walk me down the aisle. He’s going to miss everything. He won’t ever meet his grandkids, and that’s if I ever truly get married.”
She sits on a bench, and the tears topple over one another down her cheeks. This is what Lottie’s warning was about. It’s the night before our wedding, and she’s falling apart.
“Not that it matters, right? We’re not marrying for love. We’re not going to have kids. After I secure the loan and get the land in black, I’ll probably be too old to have kids. So maybe he’s not missing out on anything anyway.”
I try to catch up to her thoughts, unsure which direction I should go to try to make her feel better.
“I’m just so scared. Scared I can’t do what it takes to make this business successful. Scared I can’t save my family farm. Scared I’m going to ruin your future, and you’ll lose your land. Scared about—” She stops speaking abruptly. “Just everything.”
“What else? Get it out. You’ll feel better.” I squat in front of her, wiping the tears from her red-rimmed eyes.
“Scared that I’ll lose you with all this. I mean.” Her hand raises in the direction of the chicken coop again. “Look how much you did for me.”
I shake my head emphatically. “You’ll never lose me. No matter what happens in the future, I’m always gonna be here for you. Always.” And I mean every word.
I’m more afraid she’s going to find someone else and move on. If I really dig deep into why I was so willing to do this fake marriage thing, it’s probably some fucked up selfish need to lock her down a little longer, not give her a chance to meet someone. She shouldn’t be worried about losing me. I could be destroying her chance to have kids just because I’m a selfish bastard.
