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“Are you terrified of me?” I ask as my fingers trail up and down her spine.
“No,” she says, pulling back and looking up at me with furrowed brows. “Why would you ask me that?”
“I shot your father point blank. Three times. His knee, hip, and ribs. I took the shot that ensured he bled out. Do you fear that one day I might lose control, grab a gun, and decide to shoot you?”
“No, of course not.”
“Exactly. It’s the same for me, Rae,” I tell her. “I could never fear you for what happened here tonight in the same way you could never fear me. You took back everything he stole from you, and you did it in a way that made me so damn proud of you. He died knowing you won, and there’s nothing that can take that away. You were a warrior today. You fought hard, and you won.”
More tears spill from her eyes, and she squishes her face harder against my chest. “You really think so?”
“I know so,” I murmur. “I love you, Rae. I would let this whole world burn just to see you smile, and today, you fucking shone as bright as the sun. You might not feel it now, and it might take a little while for you to feel okay again, but just know that I will be right here, always ready to catch you when you fall. I’m not going anywhere, Rae.”
Raleigh lifts her chin, squinting as the water ricochets off my chest and against her face. “You really love me that much?”
“Do you even need to question it at this point?”
A soft smile pulls at the corners of her lips. “Not even a little bit.”
33
Raleigh
4 MONTHS LATER
The crowd roars as Demon’s Curse makes their grand entrance for the final show of the Bleed For Me tour, and I cheer along with them, never so excited. It’s almost bittersweet to see it come to an end, but I’m also pumped for everything the boys still want to achieve.
Ezra has been writing like crazy, and I know he’s itching to get into the studio and finally lay down some new songs, but I have it on good authority that the eager fans won’t have to wait too long. It’s been far too long since they put out a new album, and sure, it has everything to do with losing Axel, so they can be forgiven, but since allowing ourselves the time to heal, the grief isn’t as crippling as it once was. It’ll never completely go away, and we will always ache on the inside, but now we’re looking forward to all the new experiences and adventures Demon’s Curse gets to have. Not to mention, it’s mine and Ezra’s chance to be a real couple, away from the limelight. Well, as much as Ezra can ever be, which isn’t much, but it still counts. We get to experience life together like normal human beings, build a home together, and fill it with love, and nothing has ever made me so happy.
Being the last show, Madds and I stand among the crowd instead of in the wings like I usually do, wanting to experience the show the way it was meant to be, which is only made better by the fact that after being back in Ezra’s life for five months, I finally know the lyrics almost better than he does.
We’ve been here in Switzerland for almost a week, and it’s been incredible. I’ve always wanted to come here, and I’m so grateful to Lenny and Louder Records for bringing me along on this tour and allowing me the chance to experience the world in a way I never would have been able to from the back of my car.
Dylan, Rock, and Jett do their thing as they start the intro for the first song on the setlist, and I clutch Madds tighter, never having been so excited in my life. I know exactly how Ezra is about to shoot out of the stage. I know how he will hold himself in the air for the two seconds that he’s airborne, and I know the exact stance he’ll take as he lands directly in the center of the stage, yet my stomach gets butterflies every time. It’s one thing getting to be with Ezra, but it’s another getting to experience him as Ezra Knight, the biggest rockstar on the planet.
Dylan finds us in the crowd, and considering we’re front and center, it shouldn’t have been too hard for him, and when he winks at Madds, she all but combusts next to me. The two of them are doing my head in. I shouldn’t have encouraged it so hard, but there’s no denying how perfect they are. They’re rocking the honeymoon stage, and while I love how in love they are, having to hear Madds recap their sexcapades makes me want to throw up. She’s not shy about the details either. Though I have to give credit where credit is due, Dylan clearly knows his way around the female body. Maybe it’s a guitarist thing. They’re all good with their fingers.
Madds squeals from beside me, and as Dylan grins back at her, she grips the bottom of her shirt and rips it up, letting her tits fly free. Dylan’s grin all but splits his face in half, and judging by the look on his face, he’s probably wondering just how soon he can shove his face between them.
I can’t help but laugh. I hope Ezra isn’t hoping for the same kind of show. Though, what difference does it make? After my father decided to live stream me in that hotel room, the whole world is intimately familiar with my tits. Not to mention, the video has been uploaded across the dark web and onto random porn sites. Ezra’s lawyers have been working overtime trying to scrub it from the internet, but no matter how hard they try, it seems I can’t escape it.
Shit. Too soon.
The reminder has my mood plummeting. I’ve been struggling a lot since that night. There’s no sugarcoating it; I’m a wreck, but I’ve been doing therapy, and so far, it seems to be working wonders. I still have a long way to go until I’m even remotely close to being okay, but just as Ezra promised, he’s been at my side every step of the way. And truth be told, I feel most at ease when I’m lying in his arms at the end of a long night.
He’s been my rock through everything, and I can’t wait for it to be over. Even in his death, my father is still haunting me. I can’t escape him. It’s been one thing after another.
I’ve had detectives bombarding both Ezra and me about his death. I’ve had the media asking me to sell my story, offering me millions of dollars with the condition that I give every sordid detail about the abuse I’d suffered at my father’s hand. I’ve been offered tell-all book deals and movie rights.
On top of all that, there’s the case of the missing inheritance.
Well, it’s not so missing anymore. My father was found guilty of inheritance theft, not that he’s actually here to be charged with it, and considering everything, the courts were quick to rule that everything Axel left for me was returned as it should have always been. Only, over the past two years, my father did a great job at spending as much of Axel’s wealth as he possibly could, drinking it away like the foul, pathetic loser he was. However, the money will soon be returned to me after the sale of the old Michigan home goes through.
As the sole living relative, the house became mine after my father’s death, but I wanted nothing to do with it, and despite the good memories I had of my mother and the boys, I was all too willing to say goodbye to it and welcome a new beginning away from that part of my life.
Thank God for therapy, right? But also, thank God for the money Axel left me because, with all these therapy bills, I’m going to be blowing through it in no time.
The tempo starts to rise, and I jump up and down like the rest of the crazed fans in the crowd, recognizing Ezra’s cue, and like lightning, he shoots up into the sky with fireworks exploding around him. The label took no shortcuts tonight, wanting this show to be the best one they’ve ever put on, and despite Ezra only having been on stage for a mere moment, they’re already exceeding all expectations.
