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“What’s got you in such a good mood?” Orion asks, half-smiling as he gazes my way.
“You mean, aside from that double orgasm?” I giggle. “Nothing much. I’m just enjoying the moment, Orry. It’s all I can do.”
“We’ll do everything we can to stay with you, Nadia,” Kai feels the need to say, his brow furrowed as he stares ahead. “I have no intention of going down anytime soon.”
“Neither do I,” Drake echoes.
“Same,” Orion adds.
It fills me with hope to hear them say such things. A man with nothing to lose may not fear death, but he may not cherish life too much, either. Whereas a man who is determined to live will fight death off with everything he’s got. “Come home to me, all of you, come home to me. No matter what you have to do, no matter what happens,” I say.
It's my way of giving them carte blanche, of abandoning every sense of morality in favor of love and survival. These men are fighters, trained killers long before they came back to the States. Colton has no idea what kind of beasts he’s about to unleash.
I’m not sure what scares me more—the prospect of losing my men in the upcoming fight, of them being hurt or potentially worse, or the prospect of them losing themselves as they burn the Black Devils down to the ground.
They will abandon their humanity to win this war.
Will they be able to come back from that, or will they forever be drifting, their souls torn from their bodies as the ghosts of those they’re about to murder haunt them for the rest of their lives? And how will I be able to build a life with them? How will I raise a child with them? It seems like there isn’t a truly good or satisfying answer, no matter how I pose the question.
There is no happy ending here, is there?
18
Nadia
Worried that I might be spotted coming out of the clubhouse, Orion insists that I spend the rest of the afternoon in his office and wait for nightfall to leave. Drake has already moved my Prius behind the building and out of sight, while Kai has instructed every club member, prospect, and employee to keep their mouths shut about me. No one can know.
Normally, I’d mind being kept hidden away like this, but given the circumstances, I have to admit I kind of like the fierceness with which my men are determined to protect me.
It’s quiet as I sit on the couch and treat myself to a burger and fries. “How’s your dad?” Orion asks, breaking the silence. He sits behind his desk, going over some files, while Drake is busy texting his buddies in the DMV. They’re still looking for the driver who plowed into their men. I shudder to think of what they’ll do when they find the guy.
“He’s good, as good as he can be,” I tell them. “Still pissed off that I don’t want to go to work for him.”
“You’re not cut out for that business,” Drake says, absentmindedly. “You like the hospitality industry too much.”
“Drake’s right,” Orion adds with a soft smile as he leans back into his chair. “I saw you working the bar every night. You give off a good kind of energy, Nadia. People are naturally drawn to you. If anything, our sales have gone down since you left.”
“Seriously?” I reply, my cheeks growing warm. “I don’t believe you.”
“Believe it,” he says, then nods back at Drake. “Our numbers man can confirm it.”
Drake gives me a playful wink. “He’s right. It’s a slight dip, but the difference is noticeable, nonetheless. Guys are more eager to drink when you’re around. They buy food so they can spend more time around the bar, too. It gives them a reason to stay without appearing creepy.”
“I never noticed,” I mumble.
“You were too busy doing a great job,” Orion quips. “Besides, you may still be inexperienced at this point, but I see great things in your future if you continue to evolve and develop your skills in the hospitality industry. I’m serious. The idea of you running a bed and breakfast somewhere along the coast doesn’t seem crazy, not one bit.”
I can’t help but let my mind wander back to that. I’ve been thinking about it since the guys started taking me to these lovely places in the middle of seemingly nowhere. Hidden between California’s lush hills, tucked away between layers of orange groves and hydrangea gardens, Spanish-style haciendas have been rising for years to offer luxury accommodations with a deep connection to nature and a way to find absolute peace.
“I’d love a place like that. A big mansion, maybe, two levels, with a sprawling kitchen and dining area, private rooms with terraces and ensuite bathrooms. Five or six of them, tops. I’d focus on the quality of the accommodation experience, not the quantity,” I say to Orion and Drake. “I’d charge a fortune, obviously, but they’d get the full package: luxury bedroom, a private, cozy seating area, terraces that overlook a garden with an infinity pool, to be specific.”
“You’d offer meals, too, right?” Drake asks, a smile testing his lips.
“Oh, yeah. It's all organic, locally sourced,” I say. They’d have breakfast included and an option for lunch and dinner. I’d bring Napa Valley wines into the bar, only from Napa Valley. You know, I’d like to support the local economy.”
Orion nods slowly. “Yeah, unfortunately, the recent wildfires have taken a toll on that whole area.”
“I’d also offer sightseeing and hiking tours,” I continue, letting my mind wander even farther from the present. They’d have a high-quality shuttle ready to take them on tours of their choice: Hollywood, wine country, the beach. We’d have biking and hiking trails, for sure, and trips to the San Diego Zoo would sell like hotcakes, I bet. And tours of Palomar Mountain, maybe. The possibilities are endless.”
