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“Have you eaten anything today?”
It’s early afternoon, and I’ve already devoured half of the casseroles in the fridge. Our kitchen staff left me some goodies in there—crispy chicken strips, roasted potatoes, a cheese and cauliflower dish that softened my very soul, and a couple of slices of apple pie.
They cook twice a week and make sure there’s always plenty to eat.
“I’ve eaten, yes.” He doesn’t need to know about the concerning spike in my appetite. I went through those strips and taters like no tomorrow. We’re out of pie, and the girls are coming back on Friday to cook again. I’ll have to raid the pantry next because this sweet tooth is only getting sweeter. “How about you?”
“Yeah, I’m good. Nadia, I’m worried about you.”
I scoff lightly. “Don’t be, Dad. I’m fine. I’ll brush it off and move on.”
“I’m sorry for the way it ended with the clubhouse, but I’m well aware of the situation, and I’m glad they decided to pull the plug. It’s safer for you, trust me,” he says.
“I’m glad everybody else is making my decisions for me,” I shoot back, crossing my arms. “Sure, kick me out because the Big Bad Wolf decided to stroll into town. Like I’m some porcelain doll.”
“Nadia, these are dangerous people,” Dad insists. “You never belonged there in the first place, and you definitely don’t need to be there when the Black Devils attack. Because they will attack.”
My heart jumps. The thought of violence embroiling the club, of something happening to Kai, Drake, or Orion, makes my knees weak and my heart ache. “Have you heard anything from them?” I ask in a weak voice.
“They’re fine for now, but the Devils are closing in, teasing the Blackthorn Riders out on the open road. A couple of Colton’s goons went into the rotisserie the other day and demanded that they start paying a protection tax,” Dad says.
The rotisserie is one of the newer side businesses in Anaheim that the guys started to fund their transition from drug-running activities. It’s been going great but hearing that the Devils are looking to sabotage their efforts to go legal has my nerves zinging with anxiety.
Sooner or later, Orion and the club will have no choice but to respond with violence.
“That being said, I’ve got a junior account manager position waiting for you,” Dad adds, his eyes searching my face with caution. “You’ll need a couple of weeks’ worth of training, but I know you will knock it out of the park, Nadia. Why don’t you consider it?”
“I’m not ready to come work for you.”
I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to work for my dad. I just want to go back to the clubhouse. I miss the people there, the smell of spilled beer and burnt tobacco. Hell, I even miss Carla’s scrunched-up drunken face and Paddy’s dirty jokes, the occasional brawls between prospects, and the Thursday night karaoke sessions that made my ears bleed.
“Nadia.”
“I’ll be upstairs,” I tell him and walk out.
I’d stick around and argue about it some more, but my morning sickness doesn’t stick to mornings alone. I’m about to hurl, and I need to do so in my own bathroom.
This can’t be the end of what we had. It can’t be. We were good together. I never imagined I’d be so happy and fulfilled with three men the way I was with them. I miss our intimacy, the way we laughed at one another’s jokes, the way they sat and told me about their day while I lay naked between them, basking in the sweetest afterglow.
I miss the way they’d secretly wink at me whenever they came into the bar and the quickies in their office or the storage room. My nights are lonely and cold, yet I don’t know what I can do. It’s not in my nature to beg or grovel. I’d give anything to see them again. Until then, however, I need to figure out what the hell I’m going to do about myself.
This baby is proof that we were meant to be, and it’s not something I imagined I’d feel so soon. It scares and exhilarates me at the same time, yet without knowing where it ends, the uncertainty is unbearable.
12
Orion
Nadia’s absence is taking a serious toll on all three of us.
We’re on a constant razor-sharp edge. We drown our sorrows in whiskey at night and chug gallons of coffee in the morning so that we can keep our heads screwed on straight while we try to figure out a way to keep the Devils at a safe distance. Unfortunately, there is no peaceful method or reasonable conclusion in sight.
Not after what Colton told me.
I’ll never forget what he said that day outside the clubhouse. Colton came to talk, to issue his demands and a cold warning, while I worried that he might see Nadia and somehow figure out that she’s important to us. The last thing I wanted was for her to get caught in the crossfire.
“What did Harrow say precisely?” my father asks.
Seated around the club table in the backroom are Kai, Drake, my father, and me. Paddy is our senior member, so he is automatically involved and always present at these meetings, except this time, he decided to bring in Rufus “The Knight” Williams to assist. He’s the bane of my fucking existence.
