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“I hate to rain on your naughty night, but can I ask you a question?”
“You’re my twin. Let me close my eyes and sense your double-dick dilemma.” She slams her lids shut. “The answer is yes for peno-anal.”
“What the fuck is that?”
“It’s the scientific name for a DP.”
“Leave it to you to ruin hot sex with boring science.”
“Boring science tells me I hope you packed a cleaning kit.”
“Vale!” I snap. “I don’t need advice on enemas. I know how to prep my chute. I’m serious. I’m talking about my heart.”
“Uh-oh. There’s no douche for that.” I can tell Vale’s sitting at her manager’s desk at Delta’s. But she must be alone because she’s solely focused on me. “Shoot.” She stuffs down her grin. “I mean ‘shoot,’ not ‘chute.’ You know what I mean.”
I sigh. I’m serious. “Did you ever feel like a distraction for Dad? Like, his job, his sport was always more important than us?”
“Honestly,” she answers. “Yes and no. When we were little, yes, I don’t remember him much. I just remember him and Mom fighting about how he was gone all the time, but once I started playing in junior tournaments and winning, I couldn’t escape Dad’s attention. I was his junior golf champ until he took all the fun out of it, and I hated the pressure and quit.”
“Yeah, you got the sports gene, but not me. Or maybe I just hated it and never wanted to play because of Dad.”
“And now you’re in love with one of the top athletes in the country,” she adds. “And you worry it’ll hurt the same, that he’ll be too distracted like Dad.”
There’s the student-loan brain I need. It makes her mountains of grad school debt sorta worth it.
“On the one hand, yeah,” I reply. “That’s the life of a top athlete. They have to focus. They can’t get distracted. We saw it ourselves.” I pause. “But on the other hand, Beau’s not like that. When he gives, he gives his all. I saw how he was with Reese. Or how he tried to be. He’d never treat me like a distraction, but what if I am, and he loses and resents me for it? Like Dad did?”
“Look,” she answers. “Think for yourself, not for someone else.”
“That’s what Mom used to say.”
“Exactly, and that’s what she’d say now.” Vale sighs and yes, we miss her, and yes, I’m so lucky to have my sister still. “I never thought I’d say this to my boss-bitch bookish twin,” Vale continues, “but just do it. Be a WAG.”
“A WAG?”
“A wife and girlfriend of a high-profile athlete.” She rolls her eyes. “Jeez, you act like our dad wasn’t married to four of them and dated a gazillion, too.”
“That’s why I don’t want to be one.”
“Okay then, don’t,” she answers, softly grinning. “Be the girlfriend in love with that cute guy from college that you write all your alien porno love books about. The guy who really loves them and loves you too.”
“They’re not porn,” I scoff. “They’re romance. They’ve got a plot.”
“Uh-huh. And where is this Colt guy in this plot?”
“It’s complicated.”
“Oh,” she laughs. “Complicated like romance? Or like group porn?”
“Do you have room in your clit closet to talk?”
“Nope.” Her eyes sparkle. “I have a big secret board room you can’t even imagine.”
“What?” I sit up, bare titties swinging. I don’t care. It’s my sister, and she needs to stop with the jumble fuck tease. “What do you mean by a secret boardroom?”
“Call me in a couple of days,” she sings. “You know, when you’re engaged to Beau Bronson.”
She ends our call and leaves me better and worse than before.
