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Hands gripping the wheel, he battled with the overwhelming urge to ask him if he felt the same, ultimately deciding that now wasn’t the appropriate time.
But he knew that at some point, he’d have to bite the bullet.
Hayes helped Ryan carry his bags up to the apartment and into Ryan’s room. He peeped the comforter quickly, making sure Amara had gotten rid of all the evidence, which she had. “We’ll head out around 3:00. Come get us. We’ll Uber over so no one has to drive home tonight,” he said, leaving Ryan to reunite with Amara in private, even though he really wanted to stay just to make sure it didn’t go south.
Ryan looked around his room, thinking about how much he’d missed being here. Glancing at his dresser, he noticed the picture of him, Amara, and Hayes had been flipped on its face, which he thought was strange. He walked over and flipped it back up, smiling at it. They’d both become two of his absolute favorite people in the world in such a short amount of time. Sure, he had his issues with both of them, but what friendship didn’t have its issues?
One thing he knew for certain, deep down in the darkest parts of his soul, is that no matter what, either of them would go to bat for him in a second. He remembered telling Amara before he left that he didn’t have a whole lot to be thankful for, but he regretted having said that. Those two alone filled his heart with gratitude.
“Knock knock,” she said, tapping against the doorframe, startling him. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.”
As hard as he tried to fight it, the sight of her standing there brought him immediately to tears.
“No, please don’t cry. Then I’m gonna cry, too.” She moved quickly to where he met her halfway, and wrapped her arms around him, melting into his embrace. He dropped his head onto her shoulder and sobbed as she ran her nails back and forth across his scalp. “Hi,” she said softly.
He picked his head up. “Hi.”
“I missed you. A lot. This place just isn’t the same without you leaving your shit all over for me to clean up.”
He laughed, wiping his eyes and brushing the shoulder of her shirt. “Sorry, I think I got snot all over your shirt.”
“I’ll let it slide.”
“Being away from you sucked,” he told her matter-of-factly. “I hated every second of it. But you’d be so proud of me, Mar. I’ve been taking my therapist’s advice, and for the most part, I was able to keep things under control while I was out there. I only had one panic attack, and,” he bragged, holding up his index finger, “only one hookup.”
“You had only one hookup?”
“Uh huh. And I read an entire book. The whole thing.”
“Look at you, Baylor. Almost unrecognizable!” She punched him lightly in the arm. “So glad you’re doing well. Not texting you for two weeks wasn’t easy, but I wanted to respect you. And it sounds like it was for the best. You look a hell of a lot better than the last time I saw you, that’s for sure.”
“I feel better, too.”
“Good.”
“So how’ve you been?” he sat down, patting the edge of the bed for her to sit.
She started to, but after a brief flashback to what Tyler had done to her there, she decided against it. Not to mention, they had a track record of ending up naked and on top of each other in situations such as this. She leaned against the dresser. “Think I’ll stay over here.”
“Mar, I’m not gonna...”
“I know that.”
“Then come sit. Please? Here,” he scooted all the way to the end. “Sit at the other end then.”
Getting as far away from him as she could without falling off, she sat down. “I’ve been…good. Working a lot, writing a ton. Just finished a huge freelance job that paid incredibly well. Treated myself to a nice dinner and some new clothes.” She tucked her hair behind her ear and shrugged. “It’s been good.”
“I’m glad.” He smiled at her, wondering if she would tell him about the new guy she’d been seeing, but nothing. “So how’d you spend Thanksgiving? I betcha it wasn’t as awesome as mine. Nice to meet you, Amara. I spent Thanksgiving alone in a hotel room. I ate a gas station sandwich, watched reruns of this ridiculously dumbass show called ALF that I could not seem to turn off for some reason, and read some of a hockey smut novel.”
“That? Sounds awesome, actually. ALF was the shit back in the day, by the way. Nice to meet you, Ryan. I begrudgingly went with Tyler and Osi over to Dalesy’s, where they were doing a sort of 'misfit Friendsgiving' for anyone who didn’t go home. A few of the other guys showed up, actually. There were probably about 25 people there, which is way too many for my liking. Headed out early, ‘cause Ty couldn’t stand Dalesy’s fiancé coming onto him anymore.” She gasped. “Yo, did he tell you about the chair?”
“He did. That’s fucking insane.”
“Right? So after that, we came back to Tyler’s, smoked a bowl, and killed an entire pumpkin pie. One of those giant-ass Costco ones. Fell asleep watching Gremlins.” She shrugged. “It wasn’t bad.”
“That also sounds awesome.”
“Would’ve been better if you were there though.”
