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Ryan looked at the clock on the dash. “Shit. Alright, let’s do this.” He gripped the door handle, opening it and beginning to get out, but paused when he saw Hayes hadn’t moved. “You’re coming in, right?”
“I’m sorry. I…can’t.”
“Hayes…”
“I can’t, Rook. I can’t. You…you have to go. Just…you have to just go.”
Knowing there was no point in arguing, Ryan leaned in for a quick kiss. “I love you. I’ll call you the minute I land,” he choked out before exiting the truck, grabbing his bags from the bed, and slamming the tailgate shut.
Hayes watched his boyfriend quickly make his way toward the elevator without looking back. Ryan was about 30 feet away from him when Hayes opened his door, got out of the truck, and screamed across the parking garage. “I swear to God, I’m gonna fuckin’ marry you someday, Ryan Baylor!”
Ryan stopped, slowly turning around to face him. He nodded several times before he shouted back, “You fucking better!” before continuing to the elevator and eventually disappearing from Hayes’s line of sight.
Hayes immediately collapsed against the driver’s side door, sobbing onto the tinted window, unable to focus on anything but the combination of pains battling for dominance in his stomach right now.
There was the pain of his body demanding more oxy.
There was the pain of him trying unsuccessfully to tell it to fuck off.
And there was the pain of what he imagined was his entire soul having just been ripped from his body.
He told Ryan he would fight this. For them.
And he would.
He would fight this.
He would.
“Hayes, what’s up? You good?”
He wasn’t even sure when he’d gotten back inside the truck or called TK, but the sound of his teammate’s voice coming through the speakers of the Raptor startled him momentarily.
“Nah,” he squeaked out. “I need…I need…somethin’.”
“I got you, baby. Whatever you need. What do you need?”
Hayes squeezed his eyes shut.
“Promise me you’ll fight this for me. For us.”
He would fight this.
Someday.
“I’m sorry, Rook,” Hayes whimpered aloud.
“Huh?” TK replied, confused. “What’d you say?”
“Nothin’. Yo, I need… somethin’ strong enough to take away every last…goddamn bit of feeling I have in my entire body. I wanna feel absolutely nothin’. I…need to feel nothin’.”
“You home?”
“‘Bout a half hour away.”
“I’ll meet you there, baby. You know I got you.”
Just Pretend It Isn’t Real (11)
