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‘Well, personally, I’d go and see him. I would ask him if he killed Stephanie. Listen to what he had to say and base my decision on that. If you can forgive his past sins, accept him into your life. But you can also choose to walk away, get on with your life, and know you did the right thing in pursuing the truth.’
I thought for a moment about what he had said. He was right. The only way I could get peace from all this and relieve myself of the headache was by going to the source.
‘Thank you,’ I said.
‘Have I helped?’
‘You really have.’
‘Good.’
‘Do I pay you or something?’
He threw his head back and laughed. ‘No. You’re more than welcome to make a donation. We run many events and charities from here. It’s not obligatory, though.’
‘I’d like to make a donation. You’ve been very helpful.’
‘The box is on your way out. I’m always here if you want to speak to me again. And you’d be more than welcome to come to our services.’
‘I’m not sure about that.’
‘Think about it. The Church isn’t the scary place people think it is.’
‘I will. And thank you again.’ I stood up and held my hand out to shake, which he did.
As I walked away, I rooted around in my bag for my purse. I rarely use cash. Everywhere I go I pay with card or my mobile, so it was a relief when I found a screwed-up tenner behind a bunch of receipts and smoothed it out before pushing it into the slot at the top of the box. I hadn’t even realised I’d had the note, so I wouldn’t miss it.
I turned around. The priest had gone. I looked up and saw Jesus on the cross looming over the whole church. I don’t know why, but I curtsied before leaving. It felt like the proper thing to do.
Chapter Seventeen
On my way home, I pulled into the supermarket to pick up a few items. My mind wasn’t focused, and I walked up and down the aisles in a daze as I grabbed the odd tin and packet to throw in my trolley. I was thinking about what Joby had told me. I wondered how Dominic would have felt the morning after the attempted rape. I could understand Joby’s parents not wanting their child to have anything more to do with him, but if his actions had been caused by the medication he was taking, then it wasn’t completely his fault. I imagined, in the cold light of day, that Dominic would have been full of remorse. Or was that just wishful thinking on my part?
I paid for the items at the self-service till and headed back to the car park. Once in the car and heading for the exit, I saw a familiar-looking shape ahead struggling to carry a couple of heavy carrier bags. I waited until I had driven past before looking back over my shoulder.
‘Anthony!’ I called out, as I pulled over.
His face was red and his breathing laboured as he trundled along. He looked to be in pain. He smiled when he saw me.
‘Would you like a lift?’
A look of relief spread across his face. ‘That would be wonderful.’
I jumped out of the car and took the bags off him. I expected them to be heavy, but they didn’t seem to be as heavy as Anthony had been making out.
‘I do this every time,’ he began, as I placed them in the boot. ‘I write a list of the things I need, but I see items on offer and think I may as well buy them while I’m here. I forget I’ve got to get the bloody things home.’
‘I’m the same. If it’s on offer and it’s covered in chocolate, I’m throwing it into my trolley.’
Anthony climbed into the front passenger seat and pulled the door closed. He shuddered and held his hands in front of the heater to warm them up.
‘Sorry, the heater doesn’t work too well,’ I said. ‘I’m saving for a new car, but there’s always something else to buy.’
I drove out of the car park and made my way slowly up Blaydon Bank. It was a twenty-miles-per-hour speed limit, but my car struggled on the steep incline. I put the Golf into second gear and floored the accelerator. It managed to pick up speed, and I hoped I wouldn’t have to stop or slow down as I’d struggle to get the speed back up again. I turned to Anthony and gave him a painful smile. He was staring at me.
‘Everything all right?’
‘Yes. I was just looking. You’ve got a look of my Carole about you.’
