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Shit.
And like always when these thoughts hit me, I run. I start running, running away from these men who are too handsome and nice to be real, running away to hide.
Yeah, nothing has changed at all.
“Hey! Over here!” I hear a voice greet me as I enter the club where I work. “Here!”
“Okay, heard you the first time,” I mutter, a little annoyed. “What are you doing hidden behind the door?”
“And you’re in a mood, Baby Doll. What happened?” She steps back and nods. “Tell Jasmine everything.”
Jasmine is one of the dancers working here. We have both girls and boys dancing at the club, the numbers more-or-less even.
“There’s nothing to tell. What were you doing back there?”
“Sheesh, relax. I thought you were Janice and I was waiting to scare the shit out of you. Well, out of her. But you’re not her.”
“Obviously.” For one, she’s a beta and two heads taller than me—not hard to do, anyway, seeing as I am a shortcake. And for another, she’s a brunette goddess, unlike the child-like girl wonder with boobs that is me.
“You’re too quiet. Something’s been on your mind. Come on, tell me. Get it off your chest.”
“I’m fine,” I mutter.
I mean, where would I even start? Between my brother, the medical bills, and the handsome men I can’t have haunting me, I’m messed up. She should know better than to ask. All of us here at this club are a few sandwiches short of a picnic.
Short. Ha. See what I did there? I’m the shortest of them all.
In every sense.
“All right, girl, up to you.” She snaps her gum, then blows a bubble. “You’re up first tonight.”
“Shit.” Shaking my head, I leave her behind as I rush through the still-empty club to reach the dressing rooms. Going on stage first means I have less than half an hour to get dressed, do my makeup and some breathing exercises. Calm my usual nerves and get in the zone.
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch sight of Jerome, one of the bartenders, and wave at him. Then I say hi to two more of our pole dancers, Emily and River. River is only dressed in golden hot pants. He blows me a kiss as I go by.
As I hurry on, I shake my head again, smothering a grin. There are honest-to-God nice people working here. Some of them are strippers. It makes much more money than just dancing. River is one of our best.
I wonder where Faye and Jynx are. Haven’t seen them around for days.
I burst into the dressing room we all share, and groan at the chaos reigning inside. To be fair, it’s not as bad as it could have been. All of us dancers know that we need to keep the place tidy. It’s so small that it’s easy to step on others’ toes and break stuff, ruin costumes and mess up the makeup products. So we all try our best to clean up after ourselves—but with so many dancers and so little space, it’s practically impossible.
With a sigh, I pull the stool in front of the mirror and plonk my bag on it, then start stripping off my clothes. It all goes into my bag—which is why I need it so big.
And then I grab my costume and don my persona.
A Baby Doll has to wear… a babydoll dress. The tiny, lacy pink dress is a must. The customers expect it. They expect the whole shebang—bright red lipstick, fake lashes, and extra freckles on my face, my hair in a cloud around my head. Stockings with ribbons. Pink sandals with extra high platforms. Painted toenails. The whole picture.
They ask, we provide, so they can rain dollars down on us.
I squeeze my girls into the tight top of the babydoll, turn right and left to make sure I’m not flashing my nipples. You wouldn’t think it, seeing how slight I am, but I have some serious boobage going on.
The customers seem to love it. It’s one of my best assets.
And now I’m wondering if Sawyer has noticed, if he likes my boobs. If the handsome pack hanging out with him liked anything about me. If they find me pretty.
God, Brin. Really? You were just thinking that you need to stay away from all those beefcakes. Right now, the best you can hope for is to get through the evening without a customer groping you and make enough to pay the bills.
Small goals, yeah? Baby steps. That’s how this works. That’s how we manage not to sink into the mire. Handsome and kind men are way out of our league right now.
