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“And she can’t be afraid of a little PDA,” Noah adds.
“PDA?” I’m confused.
“Public displays of affection,” Cleo clarifies. “Oh, don’t worry about that. I have someone in mind and she’s a born performer. And seriously gorgeous. Talented, the works. But I’m not sure she’ll agree to it. She isn’t exactly desperate for the money. And she has very high standards.”
“Alexander’s willing to pay her extremely well.” More grinning from my brothers, who are enjoying this far too much.
“If she does a good job,” I say churlishly. “And no drama.” I’ve dealt with enough meltdowns from women to last me a lifetime. “She acts the part when we’re in public, she’s willing to sleep in the same bed—strictly platonically—and she agrees to sign an NDA. I don’t want any of this going public.”
“Of course,” Cleo says. “And she’ll do everything she can to convincingly pretend to be interested in you. Which will take some talent, and she has that in spades.”
Damn these overconfident Gen Z types. They’re tactless ball-breakers. “Thanks for your insights, Cleo. I knew there was a reason I don’t come by here more often.”
Cleo smiles sweetly. “I’ll do my best to find you a date, but she won’t come cheap, especially considering the parameters you’re describing.”
“Money isn’t an issue,” Noah takes the liberty of adding. “If she does a good job and keeps Margot out of his hair, she’ll be worth every penny.”
“What kind of numbers are we talking here?” Cleo blinks.
“I don’t know,” I say. “I’ve never had to make this kind of proposal before. What do you think?”
We all look at Cleo. She thinks for a few seconds. “A hundred?”
“That’s very…” I’m about to say it’s very reasonable when it occurs to me she means a hundred grand. “A hundred thousand?”
“At least. You could double that if she does an exceptionally convincing job. Let’s say one-fifty and you can always tip her if things go swimmingly.”
I can’t believe I’m considering this.
“Actually,” says Cleo, “I think you should offer two hundred up front. She’s more likely to agree to it if it’s an impressive, no-nonsense offer.”
Noah’s sympathetic but undeterred. “It’s worth it, bro. Margot will stop calling you, your fake date will finish her performance on Sunday afternoon and leave you in peace, and you can take a much-needed vacation on the tropical island of your choice knowing you stepped up for your best friend on the most important weekend of his life.”
He’s got a point. Fuck it. “Fine. I’ll do it. But she better be good.”
“And hot,” Colton clarifies.
“And you’ll be getting me coffee for the rest of the year if I can actually make this happen,” Cleo smiles at Noah, standing up and heading toward the door. “I’ll let you know once she confirms. If she confirms.”
I’ve never heard an assistant talk to their boss—or his brothers—the way Cleo sasses Noah, but he seems to actually enjoy her no-nonsense attitude.
Lord knows if Esther ever leaves me, I will not be poaching Cleo from Noah. I’m not sure I’d survive the week.
“If this goes wrong, you’ll be lucky to still be in one piece in order to get Cleo her fucking coffee,” I growl as the door closes behind Cleo.
Both my brothers are laughing.
Colton pats me on the back. “Lighten up, bro. Who knows, maybe she’s the girl of your dreams.”
4
I decide to take the rest of the day off.
I tell my driver to take me home. On the way, I text Esther. Twenty minutes with Cleo has made me pretty fucking grateful for her.
I’ll be taking a plus one to the wedding. No dietary restrictions
She’ll have the steak too
