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Brandon lets out a loud groan and then rolls off of me, causing me to fall on top of him. We both end up on the floor in a tangled heap.
“That was so good,” he whispers in my ear. His warm breath caresses my earlobes. “You’re amazing, Anya.”
He’s perfect. As I look up at him, his brown eyes sparkle with adoration and affection. His dark hair falls perfectly into place, framing his handsome face. Every part of what we just shared was better and more intense than anything I’ve ever experienced.
The soft moonlight filters through the curtains, casting a gentle glow across the room. My lashes flutter closed as I feel a contented smile spread across my face.
CHAPTER 4
Brandon
One-night stands are always the same for me. Wake up, throw on my clothes, and say goodbye. But what I shared with Anya last night was more than a one-night stand. What I felt—feel—is something different.
Our bond is something I haven't experienced in a long time. The way we effortlessly exchange words and her boldness in speaking her thoughts is captivating to me. There's an undeniable connection between us that I can't ignore.
As much as that little stubborn voice at the back of my mind keeps whispering for me to end it right here, I want to get to know her better. Not just because she’s imperfectly beautiful and sex with her is mind-blowing, but because I really enjoy being around her.
I push strands of auburn hair away from her face and watch her sleep. She looks so at peace. She doesn’t show it, but I know she’s hurt from her breakup.
I want to find the bastard who hurt her and make him beg for her forgiveness on his knees. I want to make her feel alright. I’d take away whatever pain she’s carrying and make it mine. I can bear it, but she’s too sweet for it.
She stirs in her sleep, turning the other way, and a smile plays on my lips. Maybe I should make her breakfast while she sleeps.
Gently climbing out of bed, I stride to the living room, where I left my clothes last night, and wear my briefs. I’m pulling up my suit pants when my phone buzzes with an incoming message. I read the first line as it pops up on my screen.
URGENT: NATIONAL EMERGENCY DEPLOYMENT ORDER
My throat constricts as I read the rest of the message and I’m reminded of the reason I’ve stayed away from relationships for so long. It’s because of times like this, when I have to leave before I even get a chance to get close. When I can’t be there for the people I love.
I sink down on the couch, my head is heavy. On one hand, A pang of guilt hit me for not making more of an effort to get to know her. But on the other hand, I can't give her any false hope because I may not make it back alive. My heart aches at the thought of hurting her, yet my mind knows that this is the reality of my dangerous mission. I take a deep breath and try to push away the turmoil within me, but it persists like an unrelenting storm.
I’ve been a Navy SEAL for eight years, and I’ve watched my brothers die in battle. I can’t make her wait, not when there’s a possibility I may never come back.
My phone rings, and it’s Nathan calling. I know what he’s calling for so I don’t bother picking up. I just throw my clothes on and briskly walk to the bedroom. Anya is still sound asleep. She has her hair covering half her face, and her plump lips are pouted. I want to walk over and kiss her awake, then have one last good moment with her, but I don’t have the time to do all of that. I wouldn’t do it even if I had the time.
Heck, I wouldn’t have even started all of this if I knew I’d have to leave so early. I returned from my last deployment a month ago after being away for seven. I’d thought it would at least take a couple of months before the next one. I was wrong. Now I can’t even tell her about my daughter or let them meet. I’m sure Alessa would like her.
I take one last, long look at her face, memorizing every beautiful feature before I swirl to the door and walk out of the apartment. When she wakes up, she may not be overly concerned that I am gone. She might wait for my return in a day or two. But eventually, she'll see me for the cowardly asshole that I am and move on with her life. In that moment, all I can wish for is her happiness, even if it's not with me. The weight of my decision bears down upon me as I step out into the cold air, leaving behind the warmth of Anya’ body.
I climb into my truck and hit the road, jamming to James Blunt’s No tears. Luckily, it’s still very early and there’s no traffic. I wish I had enough time to return to Meadowvale and say one last goodbye to Alessa, but it would take approximately four hours to get there and back to the city, so the best I can do is a video call.
I pull over when I arrive at the operation base and dial my father. It rings once before his face pops up on my screen.
“Hey, man.” He is smiling at me. His eyes are red so I can tell he hasn’t been up for long. “You good?”
“I’m good, Dad. How’s Mom and Alessa?” I ask.
He shakes his head slowly. “Your little girl cried last night. She misses you. When are you coming home?”
My silence is enough of an answer for him.
“You’re going on another mission, aren’t you?” My father tries not to sound or act emotional whenever I’m being deployed. I’m team six Navy SEAL and he knows that, one day, all he may get is my tag. No body. No goodbye.
I hesitate, then I huff out a breath. I’m not cut out for emotional talks like this. “Can you put Alessa on the phone?”
My dad nods. He knows there’s no way I’m leaving without saying goodbye to my little girl. He holds the phone up as entering Alessa’s room. It’s all pink, and there are several Bratz doll posters on the walls.
“Ales, darling, come talk to your daddy,” my father says, gently tapping Alessia.
