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Lila reaches across the table and takes my hands. “I don’t want to hurt you by getting pregnant when you can’t.”
Oh.
Something deep inside me twists painfully, but I shove it down, shaking my head.
“I would never be upset at you for starting a family, Lila. I think it’s wonderful. This is life-changing for you and Tucker. I’m happy for you.”
That’s one thousand percent true. If Lila and Tucker want babies, I hope they have an entire houseful. They deserve kids, and I would never hold it against them. Just because motherhood is one more thing those bastards stole from me, I could never be upset at Lila for having a baby.
“Well, it’s not life-changing yet,” she says, looking down. “We’ve been trying for five months and nothing’s happened.”
I shake my head. “That’s not very long. Besides, it’s been a rough year. I wouldn’t worry.”
“I’m not worried. Not yet, anyway. I’ve started tracking my ovulation dates. That way, I know when our best window of opportunity is.”
I grin. Lila’s a planner through and through. “Poor Tucker, being called upon for stud services on a schedule.”
She laughs. “Yeah, it’s a real burden for him. I’m pretty sure he’s been penciling in extra days.” She turns serious again. “Are you positive you’re okay with this?”
I squeeze her hand. “I promise you, Lila, I’m completely okay with it.”
“Good, because I might want to look at maternity clothes and baby furniture.”
“Hoping to inspire a hormone surge?” I tease.
She shakes her head. “Plan for the future you want, right? Besides, the maternity clothes on clearance now will be perfect for this winter if I get pregnant.”
It’s a long day. After I finish my BLT omelet and draw strength from a second mimosa, we start at one end of the outlet strip and work our way down. Lila focuses mostly on dresses. “Wrap dresses can conceal a baby bump, and depending upon the cut and the fabric, they can work in late pregnancy, too,” she says when I raise an eyebrow at her armload of clothing.
I grin. “Like you’d try to hide a baby bump.”
She sniffs delicately. “I might.”
Store after store, purchase after purchase, we shop our way down the strip. “You have to get something,” Lila scolds when it’s late afternoon and I still haven’t bought anything.
“I’m only here for decorative purposes.”
“At least get one outfit,” she urges me. Then she assumes an innocent look. “Something you could wear out with Blake.”
I’d been expecting her to bring him up. “Subtle.”
She shrugs. “You’re always upfront with your stories about the Whiners, but you’ve not said a peep about last night.”
“I’ll make you a deal. I’ll buy something if we can put off talking about him until I’ve had a margarita.”
“Deal.” She grins triumphantly because she knows I’d have told her anyway, and now I’m forced to participate. Lila flips through rack after rack of clothes while I let her fill my arms with garments. When she’s finally satisfied, we go to the dressing room, where I model outfit after outfit while she purses her lips and fusses. She eventually whittles it down to three options.
“Choose from these dresses,” she says when I return in my own clothes. She’s already hung the rejects on a return rack. The first is a deep red print dress fitted at the waist before flaring out in a full skirt that hits my calves but is split to the thigh. The second dress is the exact green of my eyes, a wrap dress with butterfly sleeves and a lightly ruffled skirt. Her final selection is a teal ruched sleeveless sheath that hugs my body and lands mid thigh.
I truly couldn’t care less. It’s not that I don’t like the clothes – they’re perfectly fine. It’s just that this is far more her arena than mine. I spend ninety percent of my time in work clothes, jeans and tee shirts, or sleepwear. Lila’s the one that’s always perfectly put together.
“Which one do you like best?” I ask instead.
“I think you should buy all three of them.”
I sigh. “You would buy all three, but I’m not you. If you had to choose the one that looked best on me, which would you pick?”
She studies each dress carefully, holding them against me one at a time. “The green one looks best with your eyes, but the other two really draw attention to your legs.”
