Page 2 of Finding Atonement


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“Babe, you’re about as optimistic as—”

Headlights dazzle me through the side window and then there’s an ungodly screech of metal as the car flips and rolls. My brain rattles in my skull and pain lances through my torso as the seat belt pulls tight across my chest.

For a moment, I’m transported back to the other side of the world, to a time when danger was always looming close. For a moment, I’m in some sandbox on the other side of the world and facing an IED or an RPG attack. For a moment, I’m trapped in the memory of the day my buddy, Luke, was hurt.

My heart is pounding so hard it hurts and flashes of memories assault me. I blink rapidly, trying to lockdown my past, trying to lockdown a time that is nothing more than a memory in my world now.

I’m jolted out of my past as the car comes to rest on its side. My teeth jar against each other as it slams down. Then there’s silence. Deafening silence.

When my surroundings come back into focus, the picture I’m met with is confusing. Everything looks weird, and it takes me a moment to figure out why. The car is on its side.

My head is throbbing in time to the racing beat of my heart as my brain catches up with what happened. Something hit us. We’re no longer the right way up, and I can’t hear my son or wife making any noises.

Panic like I’ve never experienced swamps me and I twist my head to see Robyn. I’ve seen so many men and women die over the years—too many to count—so I know from the awkward angle she’s at and from the amount of blood streaming down her face that she’s in trouble.

I try to twist to see my son, but I can’t move my neck without crushing pain, so I raise my eyes to the rear-view mirror and seek him out. He’s in the carrier seat, so I can’t see anything past the hood of it, but the carrier is still in place, which makes some of the tension around my heart ease a little.

I can feel my vision tunneling, even though I will myself to stay awake. I know there’s no chance it’s going to happen. I can barely focus on anything but the dimming lights in my eyes. I’m going to pass out.

I hear noises and voices, and I know someone is trying to rescue us. I attempt to stay awake.

“My son…” I murmur. “He’s in the back. Please, help my son.”

“Help’s coming, buddy,” a male voice says to me. “Just try to keep still.”

“The baby…”

“I see him. He’s moving. The fire department’s on its way.”

Relief floods me at this and I let myself drift. The next thing I know there’s someone prodding at me. I want to push them away, but my body feels leaden, so I can do nothing.

“The baby’s free,” a voice says, and relief fills me.

“And the woman?”

“Gone, man. We need to get this guy out.”

Gone? Robyn’s gone?

I want to demand answers. I want to know what the hell they’re talking about, but the darkness swamps me and I’m pulled into the abyss.

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