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But no, that can't be true, not with the heat that still lingers in the hollow of my throat, not with the memory of his scarred neck pressed against my cheek. He can't have forgotten. So why, then, does he stay away?
"Is this punishment?" I ask the silence, my brow furrowing in continued disappointment.
Therein lies the question. I press a hand against the cool glass pane, longing for answers—or, better yet, for him. But as night falls, the mansion whispers secrets I cannot comprehend, and I am left alone, haunted by the ghost of what might have been.
I sit on the edge of the bed, my hands clasping and unclasping in my lap. The sensation of his touch lingers like a ghost on my skin, both desired and unwelcome.
"Stop it," I whisper to myself. My own voice sounds foreign in the silence, like the echo of another life. "He was just a man—the first, yes, but just a man.”
My fingers trace the smooth expanse of my skin where his lips had been. The warmth gives way to the chill of the room. With every heartbeat, I feel the pull, the yearning to have him close again.
"Isn't it too abrupt?" My voice cuts through the stillness—a plea for reason. "This can't be love. There is no place for such things here." The words are a mantra, repeated to ward off the foolishness of a captive heart.
I rise from the bed, pacing the small space, willing the movement to distract me from the ache inside. My bare feet tap against the cold floor, a staccato rhythm that fails to match the chaos of my thoughts.
"Freedom," I echo, the word a hollow dream. I glance at my reflection in the small, tarnished mirror on the wall. The girl staring back doesn't know what it means to belong to herself, much less to another.
"Even him," I say aloud, acknowledging the truth that coils tight around my heart. The reality of my existence is a cage, and love—whatever form it might take—is a danger I cannot entertain.
I walk around exploring the mansion. After turning down yet another hall, I get the feeling this place is bigger than I realized. It is huge, and aside from a servant or two, I haven't seen anyone else here.
"What could one man need so much space for?" I wonder.
The expansiveness of the silence weighs on my sanity the most. I try to busy myself exploring, walking around this sprawling house to try to forget him.
After a day or two of this same routine, I am tired of the elaborate emptiness the mansion keeps showing me. I need to breathe fresh air into my lungs. It's been longer than I can remember since I've been outside purely for my own pleasure.
I have spent countless hours wandering through the halls and rooms of this mansion, feeling like a ghost haunting my own life. With each turn, I have found another opulent chamber or expansive foyer adorned with priceless art and antiques, but they all begin to blur into one another, unable to distract me from the memories of Karul that cling to every surface.
The scent of his skin, his spice-scented hair, his warm breath on my neck—they are everywhere I turn, and I am left wanting nothing more than to escape their hold on my heart.
I pause before an intricately carved wooden door, my hands trembling as I reach out to grasp the handle. It creaks open soundlessly, revealing a hidden staircase leading downward into darkness.
My heart races in anticipation as I descend the steps, unsure of what might await me at its bottom. The steps lead down into a courtyard covered in foliage. I take a deep breath, filling my lungs with fresh air, as a calm rolls over me.
I wander the grounds; the trailing and flowing flowers bring peace to my mind.
As I wander further into the courtyard, my bare feet sink into the soft, dewy grass that tickles and chills against my soles. The night sky stretches out above me, glittering with a million stars that twinkle like diamonds on an endless black velvet cloak.
The air is cool and crisp, carrying the sweet scent of honeysuckle and lavender that teases my senses. A crescent moon hangs low in the sky, casting a soft glow over the landscape, illuminating the silhouette of towering trees and a sprawling lake just beyond.
Intrigued, I make my way towards it, drawn by its mysterious allure. The water ripples softly as I approach, reflecting the flickering light of fireflies that dance around like playful children. The surface is calm - no monsters lurking beneath or dangerous currents to be found.
Instead, there's a sense of peace that washes over me, urging me closer. I peel off my dress slowly, letting it pool at my feet before stepping into the refreshing water. It laps against my skin like gentle fingers, cool and inviting.
The water washes over my body, filling me with a sense of weightlessness as I swim in this natural wonderland all alone. The moonbeams on the water create iridescent sparkles that catch my eye. As I prepare to submerge myself again, the water a cool caress around my body, I hear a twig snap loudly in the woods.
"Who's there?" I call out, but there is no answer, only silence and the sound of my own heart thundering in my ears.
9
KARUL
The midnight air of my father's stronghold is thick with the scent of impending celebrations. The torches flicker like the very stars have descended to grace the occasion with their presence, casting dancing shadows on the ancient stone walls.
“What a ridiculous farce,” I grunt. But the bitterness fades with the knowledge that it’s too late--I’ve taken my future into my own hands.
Servants bustle to and fro, cleaning every inch of the sprawling property, preparing for the boasting display my father plans to force upon me, his heir. I step aside as a timid human brushes past me, her eyes downcast, never meeting mine. My thoughts have been filled with reminders of Jasmine at every corner I turn, taunting me with the reality of what I've done and what I am expected to do.
