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He looks meaningfully in my eyes. “Honesty always, right?”
When I nod, Mateo smiles softly and leans down to brush my lips with the lightest of kisses. “We should probably head back before I start kissing you all over again.”
We’re quiet as we hike hand in hand back through the snowy scenery to the car. I’m pretty confident Mateo is silent for the same reason I am—we’re both replaying every millisecond of those kisses on loop.
With each echo in my mind, my heart screams more and more loudly: I love you. I love you. I love you.
The rest of the day flies by much too quickly considering my flight home is tomorrow morning. I wish I had planned a longer stay in Michigan, but I’m also realizing that the longer I stay, the more likely I am to never want to leave Mateo again. At all. Ever.
Later that night, I’m lying in bed wide awake. I had been texting with Amaya and Teegan, filling them in on Mateo and my first kiss. They were both dying for more details, and I promised to give them the full story of my time in Michigan after I return home. But I’m wired after messaging with them, unable to fall asleep. I text Mateo.
Are you asleep?
Instant three dots.
Of course not. After experiencing what it’s like to kiss you, falling asleep is proving impossible knowing you’re on the other side of the wall
I smile as heat floods through me.
I was going to wait till tomorrow morning, but I want to give you your Christmas gift tonight. Meet me out at the Christmas tree?
Seconds later, I hear a quiet knock. I open the door to see Mateo smiling in plaid flannel pants and a white t-shirt, one forearm leaning against the door frame. “I’ll do you one better—I’ll escort you out to the Christmas tree,” he says in a low voice.
It’s very, extremely difficult to stop myself from leaning into him and repeating our kiss. I manage to grab his gift from my suitcase and take his offered hand instead.
The twinkling lights of the tree are still glowing in the living room. Rosa likes to leave them on all night long, to keep the Christmas spirit filling the house even while everyone is sleeping.
Mateo takes one look at my pajamas—a matching set of pink pants and button-up top, covered with whimsical Christmas trees—and laughs. “I should have known you would wear Christmas to bed.”
I tap my finger against his temple. “You can log it away in your Lana file.” He catches my hand and presses a kiss into my palm.
“This isn’t fair though—I didn’t know you were coming, so I don’t have your gift ready,” Mateo says with an exaggerated pout.
“You already bought me piano music, which turns out to be the gift that keeps on giving considering how much I’m going to have to practice to get it right!”
We sit on the floor, leaning against the couch in front of the tree. I hand Mateo his present, suddenly nervous. He opens the bag and pulls out one of my old high school soccer jerseys, my last name printed on the back.
I immediately start rambling explanations. “I know it’s not the same because it’s not like you can wear it or anything, but since you gave me one of your jerseys and since you’re the reason I started loving soccer again, it just seemed like?—”
Mateo cuts me off by covering my mouth with his, making me lose all sense of time and space. There’s just his spice market tree farm scent and the soft lights of the Christmas tree surrounding me as his lips explore mine. Who do I contact about stopping time so I can stay here in this moment, in this kiss, forever?
He brushes his thumb across my cheek as he draws back too soon, smiling softly. “It’s perfect, Lana. It’s the best gift ever.” I smile back at him. “Nope, I take it back, my dad flying you here was the best gift ever. Silver medal to you.”
I laugh, then rest my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me, and we sit there staring at the Christmas tree together. Neither of us want the night to end, but we finally part ways and go back to lying wide awake in our separate beds in our separate rooms, daydreaming of each other.
CHAPTER THIRTY
The rest of winter break feels like walking through the clouds. My family and I enjoy all of our favorite traditions of the Christmas season, made even more special this year by the fact that Dean participated without too much grumbling.
My mom has to walk a fine line of being professional versus personal with her clients, but I go visit Samira and Zahra the day after Christmas, taking gifts for Zahra. Samira’s English has improved a lot, and she tells me about her laundry job and shows me photos of Hassan celebrating his birthday in Afghanistan.
Mateo and I talk every day, and I get to see Teegan multiple times since her mom lives on the Missouri side of the KC metro. Amaya comes up for a few days to hang out with us, but also to attend a women in business breakfast she somehow secured an invitation to.
We have a blast ringing in the New Year together. I’m sad not to kiss Mateo at midnight, and I can’t stop myself from imagining kissing him at this time next year in California.
It might seem crazy to some people, but I know I want to marry Mateo, even though we only started dating in September. We’ve been in the same orbit much longer. The number of passions we share in common—from soccer to immigration policy, from close family relationships to core friendships, from growing in our faith personally to helping others grow also—we fit together so perfectly.
And the fact that his future is able to align so well with my plans—it all just adds up.
