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I scrub at my arms, like they’re caked in dried mud, because that’s how dirty I suddenly feel.
“I thought it was easier to not be a part of your life more than what I was.” Smith reaches out and I scramble away from him.
“You’re a liar, Smith. You did your duty, turned up every once in a while, paid my way. But you’re not a father. You never were, and you obviously don’t like me, which is something I could never figure out. When I was little, I wanted you to love me, because I knew who you were. But you didn’t. This is the most you’ve even looked at me. So you can go and burn in hell, and take your employee with you.”
“I’m not his fucking employee,” says Orion.
But I’m not listening anymore.
Because my carefully constructed fantasy is crashing down around me. I knew Orion was sent to get me. I figured he was watching me for the same reasons, but the rest, everything that happened between us, I thought… I thought there was something else there.
And he let me believe it, which makes him a piece of crap.
Same as Smith.
Orion does the only cowardly thing I’ve ever seen him do. He drops his gaze and looks away from me and I want to laugh and laugh.
But there’s nothing humorous about it.
Two men, strong, probably as dangerous as each other, are absolute cowards around me. One’s been that way my whole life, the other… I haven’t known him long, but his crimes are quickly making up for it.
“You’re both cruel. Smith, do me a favor… the next time you come to see your friend, make sure to let me know so I can be far from that place. And Orion? Eat a dick.”
“Stop being a child,” Orion says. It sets me completely on fire.
I can’t even see straight through the red-tinged rage.
“Keep the fuck away from me, both of you.”
And with that, I storm out of the apartment, slamming the door so forcefully, the walls shake as hard as my chest when the sobs threaten to explode.
TWENTY-FIVE
orion
“That could have gone better,” Smith says as I turn and stalk toward the door. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”
I level him with a glare. “After her. Before she gets herself kidnapped.”
“Leave her.”
His words knock the breath from me. My jaw tenses, fists clenching at my sides. “Jesus, is she right? Do you hate her?”
Smith picks up a bottle of gin from the shelf and fills his glass. “What the fuck is wrong with you? She’s my kid. I love her.” He pauses. “It’s complicated. I could give you the bullshit story if you’d like.”
I don’t want to play his game, whatever that is. If I’ve known him this long and only just found out he has a daughter because he needed help, that means he’s not telling me the real story. He’ll spin a bullshit tale to stop me from going after her. For… I don’t fucking know. The obvious reasons, I guess.
Like me fucking her.
“I’m going after her.”
“I’ve got a car down there,” Smith says. “I texted my driver to be on the lookout for her. He’ll take her home.”
“And if she doesn’t want to go?”
“He’ll take her home.”
He sits back in the chair heavily, rubbing his free hand over his eyes.
