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But Dakota?
I’m not taking her future. So I end it.
“Two people need to want the same choice. I don’t. You’re not worth it. I’d have to give it all up, and… no.”
Her eyes narrow. “Coward. Lying coward.”
“You want what I don’t. Fame. Fortune. The light. You were born for the light. I need the shadows.” I swallow and take a step away.
“I can see the spoiled kid Jaxson must have been,” she says. “I don’t know the story of how you got here. Maybe it was losing the love of your life. But don’t use me for your cowardly ways. Tell me to my face you don’t want me. I’m not even asking for your love.”
“Dakota.”
She looks down. “Because I know where that lies.”
I should walk now. Twist the knife, make her hate me, but she shatters something inside.
“Dakota, I did love her. And up until recently she was the love of my life. Then you turned up and… If life was simple, there’d be no you or my job. It would only be you.”
Hope flares in her gaze as she steps up to me, her fingers trailing my chest and I catch hold of them.
“Maybe we need the light and dark from each other, and that’s why we keep coming together. I don’t fucking know. But life’s not simple, and I can’t offer you an actual life. My job and your career don’t mesh.”
“You know nothing about my career. I hate the spotlight. I make art. I don’t know if it’s good; I thought it was, but…” She looks at where the basement is before turning to me. “The online insta career is just an art project Harley wants to turn into a documentary on the rise and fall of modern online fame. I’m an influencer, and you think I’m married to that as a career.”
She snatches back her hand. “We can change it, you know. Plan always was I’d retire, fade away. But Harley can finish it early. By next week, someone else will have the social media crown. What I need is a man who wants me and will do anything to keep me.”
“Dakota—”
“Save it.” She holds her hand up. “More than that, I need someone who believes in me and is willing to let me in. I don’t need a father. Smith’s more than enough. But I discovered something. I really want a daddy to treat me the way only a daddy can.”
Shit. I force myself to push her away, no matter how much I want her. She’s better without me.
“No, Dakota, I know what you’re asking. You deserve better.”
“I do.” She pulls all the way back. “Because I wasn’t asking at all. I was letting you know why you’re a coward and that I don’t want you. Because you’re right. I deserve so much better.”
And with that, she shoves open the door and stalks out.
FORTY-TWO
epilogue
DAKOTA
I sit back, stretching my arms overhead before checking my phone for the millionth time. No one’s called me other than Harley.
Not that I expect any other calls.
But…
No, I don’t want other calls. Unless it’s my pizza arriving early.
I pick up the next few books from the packing carton and slide them into place on the now clean bookshelf. Then I add the last remaining ones and rise up to my feet.
The place smells good, like oranges and beeswax. It’s clean. I’m not. I’m pretty sure all the dirt transferred straight onto me.
But it’s my first apartment, right in the heart of Boston. I’m on deferment for my junior year at RISD in Rhode Island because…
