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“How do you normally get your mind off things?”
I let out a small huff. “I don’t. It keeps me up all night, so most of the time, I’m a walking zombie.” I glanced up at him. “I sound like a good time, don’t I?”
He fanned his hand across my face. “Tell me about the Bulldogs. I’m assuming you’re one?”
He was talking about my T-shirt.
“I see what you just did.” I attempted a smile.
“Answer the question, Lily.”
“Yes, I am one.” I closed my eyes, remembering the lighter days. “I was a marketing major. I’m not sure why. I had no real interest in working in that field. I really didn’t know what I wanted to do at that age.”
“Is Georgia where you grew up?”
“Buckhead. A really pretty part of Atlanta. School was about a two-hour drive, so I moved on campus as a freshman and then got an apartment my junior year, moving back to Atlanta once I graduated.” My hand ran lower to the next button on his shirt.
“My parents passed a couple of years later. I could have moved into their house since I was already flying at that point. I just needed a crash pad during the little time I was home, but it didn’t feel right to return to a house that no longer felt like home.”
“Hold on a second.” He sat up a little higher. “They’re gone?”
“A car accident.”
“And it killed them both?” When he saw my reaction, he continued, “Jesus, Lily. What happened? Unless you don’t want to talk about it—don’t feel pressure to.”
My parents were easier to talk about than David, which made absolutely no sense. Maybe it was because I’d spent years working through the grief, where things with David were still so present and raw.
“It’s okay. I don’t mind talking about it.” My hand flattened on the middle of his torso. “Have you seen the movie Beetlejuice?”
His eyes widened. “Don’t even fucking tell me …”
“Instead of a dog, it was a guy who had lost control of his motorbike. They were on a two-lane bridge, and the motorist was weaving along the middle, where he shouldn’t have been, and my parents swerved so they wouldn’t hit him.”
He held my cheek with such tenderness. “Fuck me.”
“I found out when I landed in Rome. It had happened shortly after takeoff, and the police had been trying to get ahold of me for all those hours.” My arm dropped, and I scrunched a pillow under my head, rolling onto my stomach. “It was a lot to handle at that age. I’d never dealt with any kind of death before. I didn’t know what to do, how to tackle their finances, how to sell the house. I worked as much as I could just so I wouldn’t be home.”
He swiped my lips with his thumb. “I can’t even imagine.”
“They were all I had.” A knot moved into my throat. I wasn’t sure I had any tears left, not after all the ones I’d shed tonight. “And then, suddenly, I had no one, aside from my roommate and Aubrey—the Daltons’ flight attendant who’s on maternity leave.”
When his lips parted, I put a finger over them, as I sensed what he was about to say. “Don’t tell me you’re sorry. I know it’s horrible. I know you feel awful for me.” I took several deep breaths. “I wish I could say that was where the darkness ended, but it didn’t.”
I was on the other side of it now—at least when it came to my parents. I thought of them every day. I missed them terribly. I wondered what my life would look like if they were still alive. If their support would have protected me in ways that I wasn’t able to protect myself.
He kissed the back of my finger. “Tell me about flying. How did you start?”
“A much happier topic.”
“Which is why I changed the subject.” He ran his hand over the top of my hair. “How does one decide they want a career in the sky?”
I tucked the pillow under my chest, wrapping my arms around the sides of it. “A couple of weeks after graduation, I was sitting in a coffee shop, using their free Wi-Fi to apply to jobs. There were two flight attendants sitting next to me, and I couldn’t help but overhear their conversation. I ended up talking to them, found out the airline they worked for, and applied. I was sent to training a week later.”
“And you love it.”
“Yes”—I nodded—“but I love it for different reasons than when I first started. Then, I wanted to see the world. After Mom and Dad died, I didn’t want to be home. Now, I only want to be in the air.”
“To run.”
