Page 120 of Savage Don

The reality is that I’m not sure if he can actually trust me. He’s made me feel so good, but also so awful. As badly as I want to get lost in the passion we’ve shared, I know how uncertain my future is. And I know I can’t trust anyone other than myself.

Yet there are so many people in my life who have made me feel awful, and almost none who have made me feel good.

Maybe I just don’t recognize a good thing when I see it, because I’ve never seen it before.

Could Ray Byrne be good for me?

My heart says yes. Hell, it screams for me to kiss him again, to forget my silly question and my exhausting curiosity. My brain, though, is on high alert.

“I promise,” I hear myself say.

The conflict in Ray’s eyes dies down as he seems to come to a resolution. After a short, soft kiss to my forehead, he turns around and walks over to the bed.

Sitting on the edge of the mattress, he sighs. Then, those stunning brown eyes find me again, and I go to him.

“I wasn’t always the Great Don,” Ray starts, his gaze drifting from me as he remembers a lifetime of memories. “I grew up poor as dirt, Francesca. An orphan in all but name. Even if my father lived until I was a young man. He didn’t do much but drag me to whorehouses and gambling dens. Us Irish were never supposed to amount to much, he made sure I knew that. But even as I kid, I didn’t believe him. Not entirely.”

There’s an acceptance in Ray’s tone that makes it seem like he’s decided to knock down the walls of secrecy that stand around him.

Is he really about to let me in?

My heart flutters at the thought. Hell, it’s almost overwhelming. But I force myself to remain calm and strong. If not for my own sake, then for his.

“Long story short, I fell in with the wrong crowd,” Ray continues. “Fortunately, it was the right wrong crowd. Obviously, you know about the Kilpatricks. You must know that it was them who conquered the four great Italian families. It was them who cut those four families down into three. And while they conquered the underworld, I was there, right by their side, leading the charge. I’ve been around the block, Francesca. In life, with women, in business. I’ve seen it all. I’ve had it all. But I was never satisfied. Not until I saw you. When I did, I had a vision of my future. In that future, I felt something I had never even imagined I could feel. Satisfied.”

My heart is in my throat as I listen to this suddenly gentle giant as he pours his soul out for me. Slowly, I find myself floating closer to him, until I’m near enough to brush the backside of my hand against his.

“Ray…”

“I’m not done,” he says, shaking his head. The Great Don has already decided to tell me everything. There’s no point in trying to stop him. “For my many years of loyal service, the Kilpatricks granted me the title of Great Don. But that came with a catch. It was up to me to tie up a certain loose end that didn’t want to be tied.”

A pause follows as Ray searches for some unseen answer. I don’t think he finds it.

“The Italians have been causing us trouble, Francesca. Since day one, they’ve been a problem, but it’s started to boil over. They’ve crossed a line. My one job is to put them back in their place. But that’s easier said than done, even with all of this power that’s been bestowed upon me.”

A long sigh escapes Ray’s blood red lips as he continues to search his past for an answer that isn’t there. “I’m not royalty, Francesca. In no shape or form do I have the providence to do as I please, or the safety net to take unfounded risks. I’m not from some pure bloodline. When I jump, it’s only after I’ve double checked that my parachute is in working order. No one is here to catch me. When my superiors give me a job, it’s always with a caveat: get it done, or be done. It doesn’t matter how friendly I am with the Kilpatricks. It doesn’t matter how much I like our new Russian friends. It doesn’t even matter that I helped forge an alliance with the Greeks. In this game, there are hard and fast rules and traditions that cannot be broken. For me, the most pressing is that the Great Don cannot fail his first test.”

Slipping my fingers over the back of Ray’s palm, I try to feel for his pulse. His voice is getting deeper, more concerned, but I can’t sense it through his skin. Instead, all I can hear is my own pounding heart.

“What happens to the Great Don if he fails his first test?” I ask.

“He is killed.”

The revelation steals my breath away. But the moment I gasp, Ray flips his hand over and takes me in his palm.

He doesn’t even hesitate to comfort me, even if it’s his life that’s on the line.

“Is it my father who’s causing you trouble?” I ask, almost scared to hear the answer.

In response, Ray’s grip tightens around my hand. Slowly, his gaze returns from the past, and his rich brown eyes fall back on me.

“I’m not quite sure yet,” he grumbles.

“How long do you have to figure it out?”

“I was given a year.”

Just like that, my pounding heart stops beating.