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A strike of fear passes through me.
I’m fucked.
“You bitch…” Retsos rumbles, an immense fury snaking through his words. “I’m going to make you pay for this.”
“It was never going to work out…” I whisper, and I know it’s the truth. But somehow, it hurts to say.
What’s wrong with me?
Why wouldn’t a boy like that want to be with a girl like me?
That little lonely child who used to read romantic tales and daydream about all things gallant and nice drifts out from my lips like a final breath.
She’s been dead for a long time now, but for a second there, she seemed to come back to life. The sight of that blonde hair and those blue eyes shocked her alive.
Now, though, she floats away with the mist that invades this mossy ruin, just another ghost.
Without Leonid here to stop him, Retsos grabs my wrist and violently tugs me towards the back door. In the distance, I can hear Leonid’s caravan peeling away.
He’s gone. Without a second fucking thought.
I could never marry a man like that. And it’s not just because he’s my mortal enemy, and it’s not just because he’s clearly filled with hate and a careless abandon for anyone but himself.
… It’s also because he’s probably fucked a thousand whores, and I’ve never even kissed a boy.
A wave of shame washes through me at the thought. It comes out of nowhere.
Still, against Retsos clammy grip, any hint of arousal in me has long vanished. In its place comes something even worse.
A cold and lonely emptiness.
As Retsos shoves me into the back of the car and slams the door shut, I’m almost looking forward to whatever punishment he has in store. Anything to get away from this cold dark feeling that’s budded inside of me.
I’ve felt it before, but never this strongly.
It’s almost like part of me is disappointed that I sabotaged the marriage talks. A stupid, immature part of me. Hopefully Retsos can finally beat that part of me to death.
That’s my only option now, after all. Take my punishment and just hope that I can survive long enough to think of what to do next.
Castor still needs my help. But god, I wish he was here to save me from all of this.
Hell, I wish anyone was here to save me from all of this.
But I know better. There is no escaping this life. I’m cursed to hell. Always have been, always will be.
My only hope was to rule it all, but I fucked up, and it’s going to take a real devil to break me out.
… Too bad the only devil strong enough to help just decided that I wasn’t good enough to marry.
The bastard.
Leonid Barinov.
He’s on the ever-growing list of people I need to destroy.
One day, I’ll make him pay.
… But only if I can survive long enough to figure out how.
