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“I know, I know. I told him he couldn’t lie to me. That this was the one time I’d let him get away with lying to me.”
“Brave,” she says with both admiration and trepidation in her voice.
“What?” I ask. I can tell she’s fighting to not say something.
“Bella, I love you. But you don’t want to know the truth. You want to live in your world where there are fairies and princes and you get to live happily ever after.”
I am taken aback. She’s not wrong, but it makes me sound like a child.
“There is nothing wrong with that. I love that about you. But you shied away from the MC for years—your whole life, really. And now you want to be all up in its business? I don’t want to know everything and I am in charge of it. Think hard about what you’re asking.”
My lip twitches, because she’s right, and of course she called me out on it. “As if you wouldn’t be curious?”
“Oh, I definitely would be. I’m not judging you one bit. River is so mysterious, too. That would do my head in, too,” she replies, amusement dancing in her blue eyes. She leans back in her seat and puts her hand on her stomach. “He’s definitely an enigma. Look, I’m not going to sugarcoat it. I’ve heard that River is a bit of a hothead. He is the MC’s enforcer. He does it for the Angels too now.”
That is new information. I had no idea he was handling the Devils and Angels, too.
“Okay, dumb question. What does an enforcer do?” I whisper. I have known he is one. But I never stopped to ask what that means exactly.
Julianna leans in. “He enforces,” she whispers before breaking out into laughter.
I can’t help the giggles that come out. “Julianna,” I whine.
“Okay, okay. Real talk. He’s the muscle. When they need someone to get someone to talk, River comes in. When they need someone to be in charge of cleaning up...after certain things, they call River.”
I knew all this. But hearing it and picturing it, I don’t know how I feel.
“Does he like...kill people?” I ask, knowing the answer but needing confirmation.
All the laughter is gone from Julianna’s face. “What I will tell you is what I know for sure. Even after what happened to me, Romeo allowed River to handle Victor.”
I look at her with questions in my eyes. What does that mean? “But—”
“That is all I will ever say about Victor, Bella. I’m done talking about this.”
And there is the president of the Angels. She looks down at her menu again and I process what she said.
Victor, who Julianna originally was betrothed to, got into a fight with Matthew, who was River’s brother, and Matthew died. Victor also beat up Julianna. Victor is also no longer with us, and the club is better for it. But I didn’t realize that River was the person responsible for his death. I can’t turn a blind eye to this, and while the sight is uglier than I have ever believed, I still can’t convince myself to walk away. How many people has he killed? Do I even want to know? How much of this truth can I handle?
Julianna looks up and must see my brain working a mile a minute. “I’ve never seen him softer than when he is around you,” she says to comfort to me.
“Does it bother you?” I ask. “Knowing what they did. What they are capable of.”
She shakes her head. “No. It wasn’t done in haste. Sometimes people do bad shit for good reasons. And I believe that given the chance I would’ve done the same thing.”
“I don’t know how to feel about that.”
“That’s okay. You don’t need to decide now. But you will need to decide eventually. And I’ll love you no matter what you land on.”
I appreciate that, and right now I don’t know how I feel. I do know I don’t want to live without him. Does that make me a bad person?
My mind is a total mess right now.
I force a smile and decide I need to lighten the mood up. “Corey told me I must be really good in bed,” I state, and Julianna makes a sound of laughter mixed with choking.
“Is that what she said? What, to have kept River’s attention that long?” she asks, on the verge of laughter again.
“To be known as his girlfriend, I’m guessing,” I mutter, shaking my head. I want to mention the cuts I saw on her wrists, but I figure that’s not really my business. I don’t want her to hate me after only meeting her once. But I also don’t want her to get hurt and I didn’t say anything, so I feel very torn.
