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So I put a tiny bit of effort into my appearance today. What’s the big deal? I just added a little contouring to my face, and filled my eyebrows in. It’s not like I came into work looking like a cake face. Not that there’s anything wrong with girls who choose to do so.
“If you’re trying to look nice for me, you don’t have to, babe,” he says with a seedy wink. “You have a natural beauty that appeals to a man like me.”
I turn to Charlie, who is smirking in my direction. “How does he still have a job?”
“Because our boss is a very patient woman,” he says, shrugging. “And there’re no other cool people in this town to hire. So really he’s here by default.”
“I make a mean sandwich,” Elijah says, squaring his shoulders. “And don’t get me started on my coffee skills. Oh, and I’m also extremely overqualified for this job.”
While the two of them continue their argument, I think about Sylar and the fact that he never came in this morning. I know in my head I’d wished that he wouldn’t, but now I’m feeling a little let down that he didn’t show up. I had this whole spiel ready. I was going to say a charming line to play off yesterday’s incident. Something about living down the road from me. I don’t know. Something witty that might earn me another lip twitch, or heaven forbid—a smile.
Why is he so difficult?
I don’t even know if he is or not, really. I don’t know anything about him, but it sure seems like he is.
*****
“A guy just sent me a dick pic,” Christina says, not even batting an eyelash over it. I suppose since she’s a regular on several dating sites, it’s something she sees often enough that it doesn’t even faze her anymore.
“And?” I ask her, peering over her screen, trying to get a glimpse. “Is it anything to brag about or not?”
I’ve never received a dick pic before, and I don’t know what is sadder, that no one wants to show me their dick, or that it’s now the norm to do so.
“Eh,” she says, shrugging and putting her phone down. She shoves a chip in her mouth and looks back at the TV screen.
“What did you reply to him?” I ask, wondering what exactly the etiquette is in these kind of scenarios.
“Nothing,” she says, smirking in my direction. “What was I meant to say?”
I roll my eyes. “At least a thank you, surely!”
She starts laughing, shaking her head. “You’re hilarious, you know that? Why should I thank him for sending a pic of his cock? I didn’t ask for it. He sent it for him, not me. He wants me to make a comment on how big and great it is, or something along those lines, to give his ego a boost, but you know what?”
“What?” I ask, wondering what else is going to come out of her mouth.
“I’m not a liar,” she states with a straight face.
I suddenly can’t stop laughing.
“Dick pic 101,” she says, winking at me. “Maybe you should get online and experience some of this shit with me.”
“Because it sounds so great?” I fire back, sticking out my tongue at her. “If I wanted to see penis, I’d just go watch some porn.”
“These dicks are available in real life though,” she says, picking up her phone and waving it in the air. “Only one message away. Except the only guy I want to contact me, still hasn’t.”
“You still haven’t heard from him?” I ask, knowing she’s been waiting for the guy who took her number at the petrol station to call. Something hits me. “You know the way you described him sounds exactly like Spencer.”
“Creepy hot guy’s brother?” she asks, eyes going wide. I told her all about what happened yesterday when I was walking Snoop, even though I didn’t want to relive it. As expected, she laughed at me first before assuring me it wasn’t a big deal, and not as embarrassing as I think it is. She’s clearly being a good friend by lying to me to try and make me feel better.
“Yeah,” I say, tilting my head to the side. “And this town is small enough for it to be true.”
“How do we find out?” she asks, leaning closer to me. “Maybe we should take Snoop for another walk past their house.”
I purse my lips. “By all means, take my Snoopy, use him as your wingman, but there is no way in hell I’m walking past that house again.”
** Thirty minutes later **
“I hate you.”
