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Mom kisses the top of his head. “You would survive it, Bryce, just like you’ve survived everything else in your life. Because that’s who you are. You’re a survivor.” Then she looks at me. “We all are, Dave. Your father and I, along with your aunts and uncles, tried to give you the perfect childhood. We kept the truth about our family secret so that your childhood could be idyllic.”
“It was, Mom.”
“Yes, it was.” She frowns. “But we ultimately did you a disservice, I think. Training you to think nothing could ever go wrong. That’s not how life is, and we’re certainly seeing that now.”
“I don’t begrudge you any of that,” I say. “You did what you thought was right at the time.”
“Melanie and Ruby were against it. They didn’t think we should keep it from you. I look back now, and I wonder why we didn’t listen to Melanie.” She sighs. “She’s a psychiatrist specializing in childhood trauma. We should’ve been listening to her. Because the problem with secrets, Dave, is that they always come back to haunt you. You just never know when.”
“I know,” I say. “It must have been damned hard for Uncle Joe to stand there this morning and tell us all of this.”
Dad nods. “He’s the strongest man I know.”
I cock my head. “Stronger than Uncle Talon? Than Donny? Dale?”
Dad nods. “Uncle Talon and the boys went through something so horrific that they can’t help but be stronger for the experience. But Joe has carried things—burdens—all these years so his brothers and sister wouldn’t have to. I’ve helped him carry those burdens, ease it for him.”
“What are you talking about?” I say. “Are you saying there’s something no one else knows?”
“No, that’s not what I mean. I…” He chokes back a sob.
Mom rushes to him and rubs his shoulders. “Bryce, honey.” Then she turns to me. “Did you need something else, David? Because I think your father and I need to be alone.”
“No,” I say. “I have a lot of questions, but they can wait.”
Mom takes my arm and leads me out the door. “He’ll be okay.”
“I know. But what about you? This is your brother, Mom.”
She nods, swallowing. “I know. I love all my brothers with all my heart, and I can’t stand the thought of being without them. But I have to be strong for your father right now, and later, he’ll be strong for me. That’s what marriage is about, Dave.”
My mother’s beautiful face is tense, and her eyes heavy-lidded. She’s carrying my father right now, something I’ve never seen. It’s always been Dad carrying her when she needed it. I have new respect for my mother. I see a strength in her that I didn’t know she possessed.
I give her a hug. “I understand.”
Then I leave the office and rejoin my brother and sisters in the kitchen.
Angie and Sage are quiet, which is not unusual for Angie but is for Sage.
Henry’s fixing a sandwich at the counter.
“Hey, bro,” I say.
“Hey yourself.”
Henry and I aren’t overly close. We’re very different people. He’s much quieter than I am. But we’re brothers, and we know that.
“You want a sandwich?” he asks.
I’m not hungry, but I nod. “Yeah, I suppose I should eat something.”
“That’s what I’ve been telling the girls.” He takes two plates over to the table and sets one in front of Angie and the other in front of Sage. “Eat.”
Angie and Sage both adore Henry. Something about the oldest kid, the older brother—and he’s always treated them more like his own children than his sisters. Big brother to a fault.
Henry fixes a sandwich for himself and for me, and we join our sisters at the table.
I take a bite of my roast beef sandwich. Steel beef, the best beef ever, and it tastes like sludge right now. Even on Ava’s homemade bread.
