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His words were like blunt arrows to the heart, wounding me more than I ever thought was possible. Not even my parents rejection had hurt this much. I was bleeding inside and he had no idea. “You don’t mean that,” I whispered starkly.
“Don’t I?” His fists clenched the steering wheel when he added softly, “You need to disappear, and not just because Sean’s family are looking to avenge him.” His lips thinned. “You have Carlo to deal with now too.”
I wanted to scream, to punch him and sob all at once. Instead I said quietly, “So you’re letting one man dictate our lives?”
“He’s not just one man,” Valentino grated. “He’s the consigliere, one rung under the don. Everyone listens to him and no one messes with him.”
“From where I was standing earlier, he was the one losing the battle.”
Valentino pulled on the door handle and thrust the door open. “He might lose a battle occasionally, but he always wins the war.”
I gaped after him, jerking a little when he soon after dragged my door open. I ignored his proffered hand. I wanted him to suffer, even if it was laughably unlikely, knowing he’d cut my chest open and exposed my battered heart.
I followed him upstairs, only for him to direct me into the master bedroom where he pulled a suitcase from the closet and said, “Pack your clothes.” He glanced at me. “And get changed, you need to blend into the crowd now more than ever.”
My emotions were finally shutting down and I was numb when I nodded stiffly before I changed into the most casual clothes I could find, long navy pants and a white blouse. Discarding my heels, I pushed my feet into flat sandals before I took off my jewelry.
It wasn’t until he left the bedroom that I opened the suitcase on the bed and haphazardly threw in clothes and underwear. I didn’t particularly care what I brought with me. I was empty, devoid of feeling.
Using the bathroom to scrub my face free of cosmetics, I wandered listlessly back into the bedroom just as Valentino returned with a wad of cash. He threw it into my suitcase. “This should keep you going for a while.” Not content with that, he returned the ruby earrings and choker into their velvet box before placing them next to the cash. “These are worth a small fortune. Take them and cash them in when needed.”
“Why do you care?” I finally blurted. “It’s not as if you want me anymore. It wasn’t that long ago you wanted me six feet under.”
He stepped close, his big hand clasping my chin and lifting my face up so that I had no choice but to meet his eyes. “Whatever you might think about me now, I do care. I only wish—“
“Yes?” I prompted.
He shook his head and released his grip on me. “Never mind. Wishes are wasted on someone like me. I chose my path and this is the consequence of that decision.” His smile didn’t make it to his eyes. “You never got to choose, but I’m giving you that opportunity now.”
My voice quivered. “What if I choose to stay with you?”
His eyes widened briefly, then shuttered, his emotions stripped away. “You and I both know that would be the wrong decision. Either way, time will show you how much better off you are without me.”
Something shutdown inside of me and my voice came out as small as I now felt. “So this really is goodbye then?”
He went to the hangers and found a few more things to throw into the suitcase. “Yes,” he said, sounding as distant as I’d become. “I don’t want you having any regrets.”
Didn’t he realize I was filled with regrets before I’d even walked out the door? When it came down to it, my leaving was his choice once again and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.
He zipped up the suitcase then put it wheels-down onto the floor, pulling up the handle before handing me a key and fob. “Go as far as you need to. My jeep has a tracker on it. I’ll retrieve it once I know you’re long gone.”
I accepted it, our hands brushing and my nerve endings sparking then dying. “Goodbye, Valentino,” I said softly, my voice wobbling.
His eyes flashed before he took a step back. “Goodbye, my little Tilly.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chantilly
The world was my oyster. Huh. It sure didn’t feel that way. Not when I sat in the driver’s seat of my hire car yet again staring at the jeep I’d left in a shopping mall parking lot almost two weeks ago. I rubbed my eyes. It’d been thirteen days since I’d left Valentino, yet it might as well have been a hundred.
All I wanted was to see him one last time while he was out of range of Carlo and any of the Irish mafia who wished me dead. Maybe then I’d know if Valentino’s feelings for me matched the feelings I had for him.
But I was playing a dangerous game. Staying in one place for too long was foolish. Staying in one place within range of my lover’s jeep was bordering on suicidal.
How long had Valentino watched me before he’d made his move? I’d first noticed him when I’d been working behind the bar, but had he been observing me from afar even before that initial encounter? I shivered at the memory of him spying on me with William. Had Valentino enjoyed the voyeuristic show? Had he felt a possessive pull toward me even back then?
I rubbed my brow, a headache beginning to bloom. If the pull had been so great he would have never let me go. Yet here I was pining for him like some star-struck, dizzy teenager just to plead my case.
