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Sex with TJ flashes through my mind again. From the three different times we’d had sex. In three different positions. My favorite being when he was behind me and—no. Get it together.
I pull Charlotte and Mallory toward the dance floor. “Let’s dance.” I push my way through the crowd and find a spot for us to squeeze into.
“You know TJ was just being nice,” Charlotte shouts over the music.
“I’m just not in the mood.”
Mallory’s eyebrows shoot up. “Not in the mood for that?”
“I just want to forget about men for tonight and enjoy my time with you girls.” And stop thinking about TJ’s tattooed hands all over my skin.
Charlotte splits her time dancing between us and Tanner. He seems like a good guy and she looks truly happy with him. All because she took a chance in a new town.
If she was able to start a new life here, maybe I could do the same.
Mallory turns out to be pretty fun. We tear up the dance floor, rolling our hips and shaking our asses to every song. It would be nice to live with someone who’s also single. That gets added to the pro column.
TJ doesn’t leave his spot at the bar as he tortures himself with another glass of whiskey. I know this because my attention keeps pulling in his direction. Part of me feels bad for ignoring him and wants to go sit with him. But that would draw too much attention and I don’t want to answer the questions Charlotte will have.
Mallory returns from the bar with another round of shots. “So Charlotte told me your boyfriend broke up with you.”
“He did.”
“You’ll find someone else. Forget about him.”
I clink my glass against hers. “Cheers to that.” The sweet liquid rolls down my throat. Forgetting about him is exactly what I plan to do.
One shot of tequila turns into‘Let’s do another,’which turns into‘How many shots have we done?’ We drink until I reach the perfect level of buzzed. Loose enough to not care, stable enough to walk.
Mallory points across the room. “See that chick over there with the curly hair?”
“Pretty girl. Who is she?”
“That’s the girl TJ’s in love with.”
“Who’s that tall blond dude she’s cozied up with?”
“That’s her boyfriend, Chase.” Mallory shakes her head. “TJ was training her at his gym. He fell in love. She didn’t.”
I steal another glance in TJ’s direction. He’s talking with the bartender, who’s giggling and doing that thing girls do when they push their boobs together with their elbows. “He can get any girl he wants. I’m sure he’ll be fine.”
“That man is sex on a stick. A very big stick.”
“More like a tree.”
“A tree I’d like to climb … naked.”
Naked. Naked with TJ. A shiver runs down my spine and my thighs involuntarily squeeze together. Is sex with a stranger always that good? Something tells me it’s not. I think I just got lucky. The way he touched me, every kiss, every caress … it didn’t feel raunchy, the way I’d always thought casual sex would be. It felt empowering. Sensual. As if TJ and I connected on a deeper level.
“Are you okay?” Mallory asks. “You’re dripping sweat.”
Oh, I’m dripping more than just sweat. I need to cool off, can’t breathe. “I’m going to get some air. I’ll be back.”
I push through the sea of sweaty people and out the door. The air outside isn’t much better, thick with humidity, but the slight breeze cools my damp skin. I gather my hair and twist it around itself to air out my neck.
I lean against the building as I watch couples walk to their cars, holding hands and shouting goodbyes to friends across the parking lot. They all look happy. Carefree. I used to look like that. Will I ever feel that way again? Will there come a day when I don’t wake up thinking about the baby I lost? The love I lost? The life I almost had?
“It’s not much cooler out here.”
