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“You aren’t.” I feel the bed dip and hear the sound of it softly creak a few feet away. “I’m sorry.”
I’m sure he is. He’s sorry I didn’t beg him. I keep my snide remark to myself.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t realize—” I open my eyes as he sighs and covers his face with his hands. He moves them to his lap and looks at me with such guilt it’s hard to deny that he means every word.
He swallows thickly as his sad eyes find mine. “I know you love him. I won’t come between you two. Let me just ease you for now. And when he comes back, I’ll leave. I won’t come back. I won’t stand in the way of mates.” A chill of despair washes through me and I shake my head, denying that I love Owen, denying the very truth he speaks. I don’t want to love him. I don’t want to love either of them. Not when I plan to leave as soon as I’m able.
“I heard you. I heard everything.” He spears his fingers in his hair, the same way that Owen does, and places a gentle hand on my thigh. My body sparks at the simple touch and I feel an intense urge to lean into him and rub against his body. “I know what the heat does, and I won’t take advantage. My needs will be my own to take care of. Just let me take the pain away.”
A lump grows in my throat as I watch him slowly stalk toward me. His inhales are low and deep, as though his chest hurts him by simply breathing. I thought I knew exactly who he was and what he thought of me. But the man sitting on the bed with me is nothing like the Luke I’d conjured in my head.
“I don’t know what to say.” I’m confused and tears unwillingly leave me. I don’t understand the emotions laying heavy on my heart.
“I love you, Emma. I’ll always care for you. But I understand that you don’t feel the same toward me.” My eyes blur with tears as I watch him take my hand in his. “I wish you may one day want to give me another chance. And if you ever decide you could love us both, I’ll come for you.” He kisses the back of my hand and then turns it over to kiss my wrist.
“I’ll be here for you. If you need me to take away the pain. Just let me know.” He takes another deep breath and slowly rises to leave me.
A hole gashes my heart watching him. I know he could be lying and I should keep my guard up. I’ve met assholes like him who will say anything they can to get what they want. That’s what this is. It must be. I bet he’s lying about not using me for his own needs too. Well, two can play that game. I’m in desperate need and I’m willing to give him the chance to prove me wrong. Not that I think he will.
“Please,” I finally speak, just as he reaches the door. He quickly turns and I second guess my opinion of him when I see the hope in his eyes.
“Please what, Emma?”
“Please make it stop.”
“What do you want me to do?” Honestly, I don’t give a fuck. I just need this sensation to leave me. I can’t stand this heat that makes my body shake with need. I’m on the very edge of my release and it’s all I can think about. Swallowing thickly, I shake my head unable to think, and as though he understands, he settles between my thighs and pushes two large fingers into me and strokes against my g-spot. The pleasure is instant but still not enough. My body hums at the simple touch and I fall heavy against the mattress as my body gives in to the indulgence. He pinches my clit, and that’s all I need to take me over. A slow wave of pleasure rocks through my body. His touch leaves me as aftershocks make my entire body quiver. All too soon it’s over and the need to come again hits me instantly, frustrating the hell out of me. My head thrashes from side to side as my hands cover my face. I just want it to stop. Tears leak out of the corner of my eyes. It hurts too much.
The need slowly subsides as Luke’s warm tongue gently licks my core. “Better?” he asks, lifting his head only slightly. My hands grip his hair as a frustrated moan leaves me and I push myself back onto his tongue. My eyes pop open, realizing how desperate I’ve shown myself to be, and I expect him to laugh. Instead, he suckles my clit into his mouth and continues finger fucking me. I lay my head back and moan into the warm air. I’m vaguely aware that I’m pushing my pussy into his face, wanting more, needing more.
I need him. Just as the thought hits me, I get pissed. He’s doing this to me. He’s making me need more by keeping me on edge. Just like Owen did when we first made love. But Luke isn’t doing it to make anything feel more intense. He’s doing it so I’ll ask him to fuck me. So I’ll beg him. The pain is unimaginable. Of course that’s what he’s doing. That’s what he wants. It doesn’t matter though, I’m going to leave. I have to leave. I can’t stay here. So what does it matter?
I remember our first time. He took my virginity. I gave him that. I swallow the lump in my throat as another orgasm threatens to paralyze my body. I’ll let him have me beg. I’ll pretend he loves me. I want it so bad. I want him to love me. But I’m a fool to think that he ever will. He’s not the kind of man who loves a woman. I can pretend though. Like he’s pretending now.
“I need you Luke.” I wipe the corner of my eyes and watch as he licks his lips, glistening with my arousal.
“Please don’t tempt me, sugar.” I melt at his words. He’s good at this. At pretending he’s doing this for me. I’ll drop my walls just enough to believe it. But only for the moment.
“Please love me, Luke.” I don’t realize the words I’ve spoken until they’ve escaped my lips. He’s on me in an instant. Kissing up my body, my neck. Taking my lips hungrily with his. I taste myself on his tongue and moan into his mouth as he rocks his hard dick against my pussy.
“Tell me what you want me to do.”
“Please fuck me Luke.” I say the words and a piece of me breaks. He told me I’d beg and I did. I push it down. This is just make-believe. It doesn’t make me any less of a woman to play out this fantasy.
“No.” His hard word catches me off guard. “Tell me what you want.”
I stare at him. His eyes shine with hope and desire. His breath is ragged. I obey my Alpha. “Fuck me, Luke.”
He slams into me the moment the words are spoken. A strangled cry leaves me as my pussy pulses around his dick. He doesn’t still in me, doesn’t give me time to adjust to his size. He fucks me with a primitive need, pounding relentlessly into me with a steady, hard pace. I moan into the crook of his neck as another orgasm approaches. My body heats and chills as waves of pleasure slowly numb my body in a slow, pulsing rhythm. Each wave more intense that the last.
He kisses and nips my neck. I tilt my head to give him more of me. “I love you, Emma.” His warm breath on my neck sends shivers down my body. My heels dig into his ass as my body comes off the bed and my orgasm racks through me. I feel his hot release inside me and instinctually expose my throat to him. A spark ignites between us. A pull so violent and primitive that I fear its strength. I love you, Emma. His voice echoes in my head as aftershocks make me tremble beneath him. I feel his lips on my neck and imagine devotion. As though he’s worshipping my body.
It’s only a fairytale, this isn’t real. He’s giving me what I want only so he can get what he wants. He doesn’t truly love me. He can’t.
The thought sends a cold chill over my body causing me to shudder. For a moment, I forgot. I believed him. I believed he loved me. But it was only said in the throes of passion. I’m falling for his trap. I feel myself falling for him all over again and I know I need to snap out of it before he hurts me again. Luke rolls off me and onto his side. His large arm wraps around me and pulls me into him. I quickly roll onto my side, facing away from him so he won’t see me crying.
“Sugar, what?—”
I cut him off before he has a chance to ask. “Thank you.” It’s all I can think to say. I just want him to leave. I don’t want to believe the lies and let him into my heart.
