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We turn one block from my apartment and I speak up. “You can stop here.”
“Keep going,” Cole interjects, without looking at me. “I’ll tell you when.”
I don’t argue. Cole obviously knows my intent and he obviously knows my address since he stops the driver in front of my building. “How did you know where I live?”
“It was in your file,” he says, looking over at me for the first time since we began the drive. “I have an excellent memory to go along with my ability to read people.”
There’s an undertone there that says he’s read me and doesn’t like what he’s seen. “What does that mean exactly?”
“Change into travel clothes,” he says, as if I haven’t spoken. “We’ll be in the air most of the night and change before we see anyone.”
I open the door without inviting Cole to come up with me. He opens his door and my heart thunders in my chest. I could charge ahead to the apartment. I could leave him behind, but instead, I meet him at the back of the car. “Suddenly I’m a different person than I was three hours ago?”
“I said no such thing,” he replies.
“In other words, you think you just finally saw my true colors. You’re really being an asshole, Cole Brooks.” I turn and walk away feeling the weight of his stare on my back. God, I feel this man in every possible way, but it doesn’t matter. He’s decided we’re over which should please me. That’s what I thought was best, but now, it feels pretty bad.
With that thought I dash for the door, key in the code and when I turn and look behind me, I find Cole resting on the car, arms and feet crossed. I breathe out and enter the building, all but running up the five flights of narrow stairs. Once I’m inside the apartment, I lean on the door and take in what Cole would see, a crap apartment with crap furniture since we sold the good stuff. I need to get us out of here sooner than later.
I pull my phone from my purse and dial the high-end restaurant I used to work at on the weekends and ask to be put on the on-call schedule. Once that is done, I hurry into the bedroom, change into jeans, switch to my Chanel purse, and then realize that I have no suitcase. I sold that too. I grab a large and medium duffel bag from the closet, and make do, quickly filling them both. Once I’m packed, I call my mother.
“I was just wondering how your party went?” she greets.
“Interesting,” I say, choosing my reply cautiously. “Actually, I’m headed out of town. It’s a big case, a movie star, actually, that my boss is representing.”
“How exciting. How long will you be gone?”
“I have no idea. I’m concerned about leaving you,” I add, only I realize now that wasn’t my first thought, which means on some level, I know she’s really better now.
“Don’t be,” she says. “This is good for you and me. I can stay with Marie Anne though if it makes you feel better.”
“You’re going to use this to move in with her, aren’t you?”
“I’m not going to use this to do anything but celebrate your success. When do you leave?”
“Now and by private jet,” I say. “I’m at the apartment. My boss is downstairs waiting.”
“How really, truly exciting. Call me when you can give me details.”
“I will,” I say, shoving a bag over my shoulder. “I love you, mom.”
“I love you too, honey.”
We disconnect, and I gather my briefcase and duffels, and head for the door.
I find Cole still leaning on the car. I hurry toward him and he meets me part of the way and takes my bags. If he notices I don’t have a suitcase, he doesn’t comment. He says nothing, actually, and once he’s set the bags in the open trunk and shut it, I decide I can’t leave things like this.
“Cole—”
“We’re fuck buddies, Lori. Let’s leave it at that.”
He starts to turn away. “If that’s all we are then why are you this pissed at me?” I call after him.
He turns and faces me, his jaw hard, eyes harder. “I’m just giving you what you wanted, sweetheart.” He doesn’t wait for my reply. This time when he starts walking, he doesn’t stop until he’s in the car.
What I want. Only it’s not what I want. In this moment, with Cole walking away from me this time, not me him, I know that I want more with Cole. I know we’ve always been more, which was why I both pushed him away and why I dared to risk so much with him. And I know, I know, that if I don’t speak up now, if I don’t tell him what I feel, it’s over. And I don’t want it to be over. I rush toward the car.
Chapter thirty-one
